See the night through

Concrete

2011-07-21T11:11:00.003-07:00

All of a sudden my bed has turned into a slab of hard cement. Seemingly overnight I have begun to wake up with sore apendages. If this is some sort of Princess and the Pea scenario then yes, I can feel the anvil you have placed under my box spring. I wake up feeling like I have slept on a hard floor all night. You know that feeling as well I'm assuming. Every point that was in contact with the surface is aching and sore and you wonder if someone was beating you with a canoe paddle all night in your sleep.

I hate to say this all started the day I officially entered my third trimester because it didn't - it happened two days before. I'm hoping this is just temporary and not what I have to look forward to for the next 2 1/2 months. It's like the day toddlers turn 2 and flip some sort of switch and start smearing things on all your walls. My switch has been flipped. I have ordered a new mattress topper to see if that will alleviate the pain a little.

Because to me there is no greater injustice than waking up before your alarm goes off. Those are minutes I'd like to spend deep in slumber and not being pissed off that I am awake.

Until then here I am just a little bit crabby.

Missing you

2011-07-19T10:23:00.002-07:00

I have the distinct pleasure of getting to taste most of my food twice. Its a good thing that I'm a good cook because otherwise the pleasure would be all gone. Don't get me wrong, I'm not regurgitating anything - just little hiccups here and there after eating. Not like my next door neighbor last night who was in the process of evacuating the contents of his stomache into his commode which I could very clearly hear through our paper thin walls. And the weird part was that I should have been grossed out. I've never been able to handle that sort of thing well but I just stood there...listening. And I had no one to share it with. Yes, its disgusting and who would want to share in that experience with me? Ricky. And he's not here.

And he won't be here for weeks. And weeks. All in all 3 months. And I miss him.

And since he's been gone I have realized how much my world revolved around him. Taking care of him, spending time with him, just being in the same room as him. And now I only have myself to take care of. Sometimes I cook, sometimes I don't because I don't have anyone else to take care of.

The first Saturday he was gone I kept myself busy for about 5 hours and then as I was sitting on the couch later that night I thought to myself "3 months of this?"

So I'm working on getting a hobby and socializing more. Honestly my focus is more on a hobby right now because I'm kind of a home-body. But I'm going to try and get out more. The big news is I'm in the market for a new sewing machine. I want something electronic that makes great button holes (according to my mother). If you have any advice or seem to preferance one brand over another please let me know. Who knows, maybe when Ricky comes back in 3 months I will have sewed up a storm! He can have his own puffy shirt to wear on rotations.

Into it

2011-07-07T13:04:00.002-07:00

I decided to embrace being pregnant today. I have a stomach that sticks straight out like a bullet, my belly button shows through everything and people stare. And that's ok.

I should be enjoying this instead of trying to pretend like it's not happening. I can still be cute - I might actually have better fashion going on right now than ever before. Besides, when can I enjoy being pregnant while sitting on the couch without screaming kids?

And I can't help but smile every time I feel a kick. I love to watch my skin get stretched around by the baby moving. I'm so in awe of it that I often grab whoevers hand is close by and make them feel it too.

These days I've got more of a smile than a panicked look. Besides, now that my stomach is so big my butt looks a lot smaller... Amazing.

Don't throw the baby out

2011-06-14T20:22:00.002-07:00

I avoid the couch unless Ricky is home. And since he has been gone during the week and home on weekends only for the past 3 weeks I have spent a lot of time sitting at the kitchen table. I just can't deal with the soft cushions. They suck me in and then what can I say? I just can't get up. There is a disconnect between my brain synapses and my legs and they can't work in tandem when confronted with the almighty couch.

I am so in over my head. So far in this pregnancy I have tried to mostly avoid thinking about it. I kind of pretend like it's not happening until I do something like piddle on myself accidentally like I did two weeks ago and then it is suddenly VERY apparent that I am indeed pregnant.

I went to LA a few weeks ago for a friends wedding and got to have a mini-baby shower for myself and another good friend with our friends that live there. And my friend who is also pregnant was a fountain of baby product knowledge. She has researched everything that could possibly be related to babies. Seriously, you should hear her - impressive. And I did listen. I listened to her and our friend who is already a mother discuss the virtues of various strollers and other things and that's when my heart sank.

I have no idea about any of this stuff.

Sure, I've been around kids a lot. I nannied for my nephews every other day. I know babies. I know how to work a stroller. That's the problem. I know how to work a stroller - not anything about what kind of stroller I want. There are too many. And this goes for all baby products.

I just can't do it. First, I don't want a lot of stuff. Second, I don't want to spend time and money trying to figure all of this out.

What happened to just keeping the baby in a basket all of the time?

Picture Message

2011-04-21T21:04:00.003-07:00

So I guess I'll have to remember this from now on:

And Ricky will have to remember this:

You need a vacation!!

2011-04-08T19:35:00.005-07:00

I'm putting out an APB.

Have you ever wanted to vacation in the great Northwest? Do you dream of summiting the Space Needle or Mount Rainier?

Do you just want to get away from your everyday life? No dishes, laundry and mail runs to be responsible for?

Maybe you want to take a personal sabbatical for 3 months. Maybe you are interested in doing an internship in Seattle? Or maybe, just maybe you are a social worker let's say and are interested in taking a contract somewhere new for a couple of months.....ahem Stasy.

Well come stay at my house!!!

I currently have a roomate, my mate for life Ricky. But....he's leaving me for 3 months to pursue his career dreams. And I've encouraged him. A small sacrifice for now that will benefit our family greatly one day.

There is only one problem - I will be lonely. Do you want me to be lonely? I didn't think so.

Besides, you can have your own bedroom with it's very own en-suite bathroom. Fancy! I'll be your very own bed and dinner! I can't do breakfast since I'm usually running out the door to work and I won't make you lunch because I'll be at work. But I'll probably make you dinner which I'm really good at. Come for 2 months or come for 3 days, whatever.

And if that still hasn't wet your whistle then let me tell you this: you don't need a car. That's right! Take a 2 minute walk down my street to the light rail station and 20 minutes north you are in the heart of downtown, 30 minutes south and they drop you off right at the airport. And I'm not trying to brag and all but every Wednesday from May-October there is a farmers market half a block away full of the most delicious food. Thats where I do my grocery shopping. You should taste the tomatoes....oh the delight.

My neighborhood is cute. Just like me.

So come one, come all July through September! Seriously, he'll be gone the entire time. Don't make me get a dog because I really don't want one.

And this message isn't for your brother's cousin. I'd like to know you if we are going to live together.

Can't you just picture yourself here?

I scream, you scream

2011-02-05T22:17:00.003-07:00

I accomplished something very great. I'm really, really proud of myself. Sometimes when I put my mind to something there is just no stopping me.

On the evening of Feb. 1 I started watching Ground Hogs Day and on the evening of Feb. 2 (the actual ground hogs day) I finished the movie.

I'm practically bursting with pride.

I always thought I hated that movie. I was sure that I hated that movie but I didn't really know because I had never made it through the entire movie - I always fell asleep. The same thing over and over? Yawn.

But I knew I should give it another chance because I love Bill Murray. How could he do something bad?

And I was wrong, it's actually pretty funny. At least Bill Murray is funny in it. I hated Andy McDowell in it though. She was bringing some pretty terrible acting to the table there. Actually, she mights always be like that.

I think it was just one of those things that is better now that I'm older, like brussel sprouts. Who knew?

Something else I accomplished this week? Eating an ice cream cone the size of a small baby. I think it weighed 5 lbs. The guy working there gave me a cup and a spoon just in case - even though I assured him that I wouldn't need it. And I didn't. What is even more impressive is that I finished the whole thing off before my friend had even hit the middle of her once scoop.

Proof:

Giving myself a big pat on the back for this week.

BTW, I haven't been to Baskin Robbins since high school probably and let me tell you, it was good! I'm as surprised as you.

HAIR! The horror continues...

2011-01-26T22:51:00.004-07:00

I'm going to Europe in May - wahoo! It's been too long and I'm itching to set myself free, european style, again (let your imagination run wild with that). It's just about all I can think about right now. I have already planned out most of my wardrobe - no joke. And because it's just about all I think about it tends to be something I talk about a lot with Ricky. So it came up yesterday and went a little something like this:

Me: Ricky, I think I need to get a brazilian blow-out before going to Europe.

R: I was just thinking about that today too!

Me: No you were not.

R: Seriously, I was! I thought about it on the way home today in the car.

Me: NO you didn't. Are you serious?

R: Totally! I was thinking about how you should get one!

Me: Tell me your train of thought to PROVE to me that you thought of my hair on the way home.

R: OK. I thought, "I wonder if I can get that new camera I've been wanting before Laquina goes to Europe. Think of all the cool pictures she could take......WAIT - HOW WOULD SHE DO HER HAIR?

Me: Yeah, I'm worried about that too. It could be a disaster.

R: You should get one.

Me: Yup, I think it's my only option.

Aaaaannnd Scene.

See? My hair is as bad as I said it was. My husband worries about it when he is driving by himself in the car.

While in Italy I want to go here. Dreamy.

Game night

2011-01-23T20:28:00.006-07:00

Ricky and I have this little game we like to play. It's called, "I could have hair like that!".

The rules are very simple. Watch any late 70's to early 90's movie and find the girl with the best curly hair-do and voila! "I could have that hair!" has begun. The bigger and frizzier the bangs the better. Really. Because I could actually have that hair.

The game was birthed out of my hatred for my natural hair texture: curly. Not nice beachy waves and not beautiful ringlets - a mixture born straight out of Kenny G being electrocuted for just the tinsiest bit of time. Basically, think Capt. Hook (in any of his incarnations) and you've got it! Seriously, I was him once for Halloween and it was spot on. Spot. On. I wish I knew where one of those pictures was just to prove it. Anyone, anyone?

From an early age I remember trying to steal my older sisters hair products to experiment with what to do with my hair. She had nice curls from using Dep hair gel and Aussie mousse, shouldn't I? Nope. I've never gotten it right. To this day I refuse to be seen in public with my natural hair al fresco. Just ask Ricky, he hates it as much as I do. He'll tell you!

But without further ado, some pictures from the "I could have that hair!" game:

I could have this...

And these...

See? Isn't this fun?
I could have all of these!!

I was born at the wrong time we decided while watching Top Gun the other night. Why couldn't I have weathered my 20's during the 80's? I would have fit right in.

I also would have made a great sidekick.

New Year

2011-01-16T20:33:00.002-07:00

No one reads this anymore.

Good. Check that off my New Years resolution list: get rid of everyone.

I made a lot of resolutions this year - more than normal. So many that I had to categorize them.

Before I list them off I want you to know that I really love resolutions. It seems that most people hate making them, mostly because they have no follow-through. And also because it seems that often times people want to over-achieve when they make a goal for themselves. There's something to be said for "baby steps". Why set yourself up for failure? I like to create goals that I actually want to do. That still require some effort but that won't peter out after a month because its too much of a struggle. Whenever I tell people my goals they say "but those are things you can actually do". Isn't that the point?

Lot's of people know this about me but I make resolutions for myself year-round. I like to divide my year into three's. A winter, summer and fall with a goal for each. And I usually come up with a theme for each. A little invisible banner that I fly in my head for 3-6 months. It works for me. Gives me something to look forward to.

I don't have a theme for this trimester but I do have a number of goals. Also, I have to admit that I did not do very well on my New Years goal from last year: to squeeze my butt more when I walked. I did it for a while but in the end I forgot more than I remembered. It kind of fell into the dark hole where my kegel excercises reside. Oh well, maybe I'll revisit that this summer and declare it "the summer of the squeeze!". Who's with me? They say you are more likely to accomplish your goals if you have someone to check up on you.

Without further ado.... 2011 Resolutions

Personal: read the book before I see the movie
Marriage: clean the kitchen before bed (update: not so hot on this one. Maybe it should be to get a maid?).
Work: Take care of all the red flags in my email the same day I flag them / Get a raise.
Church: Play the piano in YW's and stop whining to Ricky.
In general: Travel as much as possible.

That's all for now but I think I have some more hiding somewhere. I'll let you know when I figure them out.

I tell you what though, I'm already looking forward to "summer of the squeeze".

She blinded me with SCIENCE!!

2011-01-06T15:29:00.004-07:00

Remember this?

Alrighty, time to dust off my deep thinking and analytical skills.

Ask question:

Can I continue to eat healthy, balanced meals during my period?

Do background research:

My eating habits from the last 3 weeks have been good and I have stocked my fridge full of veggies and grains.

Construct hypothesis:

Yes, when conscientiously watching what types of food I eat and when, I can continue to eat healthy, balanced meals during my period.

Test with an experiment:

Started Wed. morning off with sugar-free hot chocolate for breakfast. Did not snack before lunch. Ate a healthy lunch of brown rich sauteed with colorful vegetables. Saw chocolate covered Oreos in the fridge. Ate one. 2:30 pm traveled to the coffee spot downstairs to get a deliciously thick 65% cocoa hot chocolate - full sugar. Dinner was a healthy and balanced green salad. Picked up 4 different kinds of ice cream on the way home (not including the samples made to determine which 4 flavors). Sampled all 4 flavors once at home on couch.

Analyze results and Draw Conclusion:

Good intentions were definitely there for the day's menu but will power was not. Gave in to enormous hormonal cravings and feeling of wanting to add extra padding to body. Conclusion: I need chocolate every 4 weeks or I'll torture everyone around me and be immensely unhappy.

Hypothesis is False.

Think! Try again:

Thursday morning had tea for breakfast. Good start. Remembered the butterfingers in my desk and ate one. Had healthy salad for lunch and then proceeded to the chocolate covered oreos and ate one. Don't remember much about dinner but I do remember the candy canes, peppermints, the entire small tin of cinnamon altoids I consumed like candy and hot chocolate.

Report Results:

Negative. Hypothesis is absolutely 100% false.

See? It's scientifically impossible to eat healthy food once a month.

Everytime

2011-01-05T23:00:00.002-07:00

I was driving to an activity tonight listening to the radio when I realized that I had been singing "my cherie amor" by Stevi Wonder at the top of my lungs over the NPR that was blasting. How long had I been doing it? I don't know. Why didn't I just turn down the volume on NPR? I have no idea. I had kind of a rough day. But after I did realize what was happening I worked very hard on my vibrato.

I got into an argument with my boss this morning. A real argument. In which he told me he did not want to argue and I walked out - and tried not to cry which is what happens when I get really angry. It felt just like being 16 again.

Speaking of Dads... I had a great moment with Ricky's Dad during our Christmas stay up in Canada. I found out something very crucial about the Great White North. Canada doesn't take out anything from movies that get played on tv. Case in point: I was watching 16 candles in the family room with Richard. Most of you have probably only seen this movie on tv but let me tell you, it's full of stuff they cut out. And I know this - but there is one part that always sneaks up on me. So Richard gets up to get something and leaves the room. His Dad walks in to see what we are watching just as the sneaky scene comes on. Picture it: Dad walks in and a close-up shot of boobs appears on the screen. Yeah. That happened to me. You can tell your friends. And BTW, when they show that part the sound on the movie makes a big "boing" noise for effect.

Of course he walks in right then. Don't parents just have the knack for walking in at the worst parts? I thought I was past that!! But I can't wait to do that to my kids! And yes, if you are wondering my father-in-law freaked a little and ran out. But to be fair later on we were watching the mini-series "Pacific" and a man's junk popped up on screen.

I think that's what you call even-stephens.

FYI and FYE: Ricky has a new blog going on that you can check out here. He is now a .com!

The itchy and scratchy show

2010-12-21T22:15:00.005-07:00

Look out world, I have hives!! Or at least that's what I think they are because God help us all if they are not because that would mean I have bedbugs.

They started last week with just a couple red bumps and some itching and now I have tons of red bumps and LOADS of itching. And this morning produced some nice patches of rashes spread all over.

This has never happened before, that I can remember. I'm only allergic to 3 things: sulfa, cats and math. And I have not encountered any of those recently. I'm a medical mystery. I need to go on House.

Don't worry too much about me because I've started a cycle of anti-histamines, unless you find me covered in scales because news flash: that only happens to single women over 30.

In bigger news, I am now starting up Laguna Beach: Season 1 all over again. Oh man, remember Stephen? He was so cute! And the drama with LC and Kristin? And Jessica? And EVERYONE is wearing flare jeans. Kristin even rocks a choker while grocery shopping - grocery shopping that she got to do in her Isuzu Trooper! Even if you hated that show (which would makes us not friends) then you will still enjoy this clip that makes fun of the show.

Trying to fit a square inside a circle was my life.

These hives are SO much drama.

Lights!

2010-12-14T22:07:00.003-07:00

I could just stare at it alllllll day. Isn't it nice?

I just love Christmas. I love walking around downtown with the trees all lit up and the store fronts all decorated to the nine's.

And maybe the best part of the Holidays is that the guy who sells the mini-donuts is back!! Hooray! He sells them from this lit up cart next to the carousel across the street from my job. I've been waiting for him a whole year.

I just had to have them on Monday - so I did.

Merry Christmas from Seattle!!!

Eat me

2010-11-20T18:49:00.002-07:00

Alright, let's get one thing out of the way right now: I like to eat.

Yeah, the rumors are true. I love food. I love putting it in my mouth and chewing it whilst savoring the flavors and textures melding together to create a symphony of ecstasy in my mouth.

Word.

When people ask me what I like to do in my spare time I tell them simply: eat. They always laugh like I'm joking. "No, seriously" I have to tell them. One of the great pleasures in life for me is researching places to eat and then eating there. Lately I've been into food trucks. Seattle has some truly great ones and I've made it to all but one so far. They move around everyday so it's fun to track them down, it's kind of like pheasant hunting (I think).

Why am I telling you this? You may already know this about me. I'll tell you. Since moving to Seattle I have had NUMEROUS people comment on how MUCH I eat. Seriously.

It happened at work first. 4 separate times.

1. Co-worker walks in to the kitchen as I sit down to my delicious bowl of soup for lunch and says "wow, that's a really big portion for one person. Are you going to eat all of that?". OF COURSE I AM.

2. Sitting down to my Chinese noodles and veggies. Co-worker #2 says "I can't believe you just ate ALL of that!". OF COURSE I DID.

3. We have cupcakes for a co-workers birthday one day. I wanted to try all the flavors. My boss says "Are you really going to eat more of those??". OF COURSE I AM.

4. Too many other instances to mention at work. Honestly, they act like I'm trying to train for the IFOC (international federation of championship eating). I'm just a fan. They think I'm a pig.

5. I'm at a conference yesterday downtown and I had a small breakfast and by the time noon came around I was starving... They served us my favorite crab bisque in a cup. Mmmmm I polished it of. Next up a grilled chicken salad. I ate it up. The waiter comes up to me leans over and says "do you need more to eat?" and then he starts to laugh. He didn't ask any of the other 127 women if they needed more to eat.

6. Later that night at the same conference we had a cocktail hour with cheese and crackers and fried ravioli (new to me and delicious!). I get a small plate and take it to a table of ladies I've never met before. We chat while I eat my sparse pickings and then I decide I want a little more cheese so I went back to the food table. The new ladies from my table were also there getting some grub and one says "look who's back for seconds!!!!" to me. REALLY.

I'm getting it right and left. Friend or foe, they all say the same thing. I have to wonder if they live in the same city as me. There is SO much great food here! How can they not want to eat it all? Especially with me? I'm really fun to eat with! I love it so much that sometimes I make noises that I'm unaware of like "mmmm", "mmmm". Yeah, I mutter delicious sounds while I enjoy my meal. Who cares?

Everyone gets their kicks and giggles somehow. I'm not judging you for taking spin class at the unearthly hour of 5am or maxing out your Nordstrom card. Go forth and enjoy yourself!

Just stop making me feel like the fat kid. Because you know what? I am.

I'm phat. Holla.

Something that says...Leather Daddy

2010-11-05T22:22:00.004-07:00

There are a few things that I'm afraid of in the fashion world.

Mini-skirts, batwing sleeves, chenille, letterman's jackets (and more specifically, suede), corset tops, turtle-necks and leather jackets.

Some because I can't pull them off (mini=skirts) and others because no one can pull them off (batwing sleeves and corset tops). Others for no other reason than I just can't do it (leather jackets).

But I changed my tune two days ago.

I saw this leather jacket about two months ago and instantly fell in love with it. Like fatal attraction fell in love with it. But there was NO WAY I was going to pay full price for it. I don't even like leather jackets. I have a serious aversion to leather jackets (on me).

I don't exactly know where this came from. I love leather shoes and bags and fur coats and even leather accessories - but I have a strict no leather jacket and pants policy. Yeah, you read that right. I won't wear leather pants either.

And yes, I've tried both. My mother owns dozens of leather pants, literally. And I mean she actually has probably a dozen pairs of leather pants - not that way Rachel Zoe would say literally. And you know what? She looks amazing in them. She pulls them off quite nicely. In fact, she pulls off everything she tries to wear quite nicely and believe you me...she has tried to wear everything.

And she has tried to push me into leather many times. The farthest I got was one leather skirt in baby blue which is pretty awesome, but that's it. She even bought me my own pair of leather pants... TWICE! I tried. Really, I did. But as soon as I took a step and it sounded like I needed to grease my squeaky joints I chickened out. Some of you may have the luxury of never feeling your inner thighs but I am quite familiar with mine and the last thing I need is leather rubbing together to accentuate that.

She bought me jackets both suede and not and every time they ended up in her closet. They just give me the willies. Plus they remind me of Ross on Friends.

But back to the jacket. I stalked it (which is where the fatal attraction comes in to play). For the past 2 months I have periodically gone back to check on it. You know, see how's it doing, check the price, make sure no one else has kept the price artificially inflated.

And I've been faithful. I even tried it on once and decided it didn't look that good. But nonetheless I have thought about it every. single. day. since then. I would look out my office window at the store down below and wonder what it was doing.

So finally after stopping at another store I thought I should just go and check on it one more time....

There was only one left in my size. Panic! So I put it on, took pictures of myself in it and then tried to talk myself out of it. I really did. But there was no denying just how cool I looked in it.

Totally cool.

So I took it home where it belonged and at less than half price no less.

I really do look cool. I'll prove it. There's a million picture of me in it on my phone. But you only get one:

Ok, two.

And here is a link that will take you to a video montage of Rachel Zoe misusing the word literally. Literally.

http://jezebel.com/5599824/rachel-zoe-literally-repeats-herself

A frightfully looong post

2010-10-29T18:41:00.003-07:00

Rain falls....angry on the tin roof. It stops me and steals my breathe...

Just kidding. But seriously, it has been raining A LOT here lately. Which I know is annoying of me to say because duh, I live in Seattle. But is it more annoying than that song? I don't think so. What do I expect? Well, I expected a summer that I never really got but I won't go into that.

What I didn't expect this year was to have Halloween burn-out so early. I think my Halloween lamp went out about a week ago. Rough. I LOVE Halloween. Love, love, love it. Partly because I have such great memories of my Dad making Halloween super awesome and partly because I like some things that others might consider morbid. I love bones and skulls and anatomy and even owls and black cats and spiders (all in moderation of course).

I love dressing up and getting into character and let's face it, I usually win the costume competition - it runs in the blood. I have these AMAZING vintage anatomy posters from 1961, 65 in all, that I got from my old boss at the BYU Law Library years ago. I found them in a box in his office that I snooped in and asked him what he was going to do with them. "Throw them away" he replied. No! I exclaimed. Can I please, please have them I begged? "For what?" he wanted to know. To put them up in my house! "Why would you want to do that? That's gross" he told me. So I told him I thought they were beautiful and I took them home and from then on they have always had a place in my house, wherever that was at the time, and they aren't going anywhere soon. Here is my favorite which will never be rotated out while I go through my catalog:

Isn't she a beaute? I know. And then years later when I married a med student they really came in handy. Only everyone thought they were his. As if. If we were to sign a post-nup they would go to me and only me. Sorry Ricky. I'm not even sorry. I love them that much.

So this year when October rolled around I got all excited about planning a Halloween party for the youth I work with at church. It was pretty labor intensive and I loved every minute of it. Here are some things I made:

Witches fingers with crunchy bones inside:

Spider cupcakes and merengue ghosts:

And I made this mummy head with a styrofoam head and paper towels soaked in coffee and carefully dried for two days accompanied with the witches fingers:

But after that and decorating pumpkins the next week and blah, blah, blah I got tired. Soooo tired. And now we have 1 more festivity to go to on Saturday night and I can't come up with a costume. No joke. I got nothin. And this is usually my forte.

Help. Seriously. My reputation is at sake! I NEED to win that costume contest or I might. just. die.

Circle Up

2010-10-18T20:45:00.004-07:00

I have dark circles under my eyes.

Really. I started to notice them about a month ago and couldn't understand why I was suddenly getting them. Then on Saturday Ricky was staring at me intently and then he reached out with his index finger to touch the delicate skin between my eye and nose. "Why is it so dark around your eye?" he said as he poked and prodded.

I'm not old enough for dark circles under my eyes. I have no children to give me dark circles under my eyes. I'm thanking my lucky stars that they aren't bags though, cause those are baa-ad.

But still. So I analyzed why I might possibly be bruising from the inside out. Work has been a little more stressful with the mountains of new responsibilities being piled on me everyday. My church responsibilities take up a lot of my time that could otherwise be spent on the couch with fresh cucumbers on my eyes. I have been wearing some pretty tight pants lately, maybe I've cut off my circulation. I don't get as much sleep as I'd like but who does?

But I think I've figured it out - or at least I hope so. Poor nutrition.

It never ceases to amaze me that what I eat can have such an affect on me. Normally I have a pretty sweet nutritional set-up going on. I've become very good at supplementing my diet to make up for the things I don't eat. And if it wasn't for my wicked sweet tooth I'd probably look like Cindy Crawford (after all her kids, I have to be realistic on this one).

You know what tipped me off? Meat. I don't really like it. We don't really have it in the house. Even when we go out I opt for the veggie option most of the time. But lately I've been scarfing it down when we go out and have some. That's not normal. I can only remember a couple of times that this has happened in my life. And every time it's because I have gotten lazy with my nutrition.

So I pledge to do better. To eat better. To get rid of these hideous dark circles under my eyes. Because heavens knows I need all the help I can get in the picture taking department.

And then my blood boils

2010-09-21T21:55:00.002-07:00

This is going to be a little therapeutic for me because I almost just had a rage blackout and need to get it off my chest.

You see, someone insulted one of my siblings on the interweb. I love a good tease, especially if it involves a sibling. I'm the first one to step in and throw the jabs and then maybe take it too far but it's all in love and comedy. What I don't like is someone being malicious to someone I love. I will cut you.

And the only way for me to write it out and not trigger another rager is to do it high school style.

Background:

Someone posted something about health care on a social site. C'mon people, this is a hot-button topic. If you post it, they will write about it.

So then he says "DON'T YOU EVER..." in all caps

and then "I don't know who you are..."

and then he gets all western with "there will be bad blood..."

and then in my head I was all "I drink your milkshake, I drink it up..."

So he finishes with "I'm a medical professional..."

And then I was all "medical professional my eye".

Phew. It feels good to finally get that out there, albeit very segmented and un-intelligable.

I feel better already.

A la cart

2010-09-16T17:46:00.003-07:00

There was a lady on the train today who was selling a shopping cart for $75. I didn't want to mess up her sale so I refrained from letting the other passengers know that they could have their own shopping cart for free. All they had to do was pick it out and take it from their local grocer.

Fortunately, and not too surprisingly there were no takers. I felt sympathy for her. I wanted to walk over to her and say "I know, it's hard. I've been there too." But I didn't because a) I was not going to give up my seat and b) I'm not sure she was in the right frame of mind for a heart-to-heart right then and there.

I used to own a shopping cart once. Well, maybe less owned and more in possession of one. Possession meaning I took it home with me one day from the creamery by my dorm.

It was so fun at first. "Hey! Is that a shopping cart in the middle of your room?!" people would ask. "Awesome!" or "Why?". Why not? It was cool. Or at least it felt cool. Two different things.

And it served us well. It provided some much needed storage in our tiny cell-like dorm room. It held books and whatever cans I had gotten from "shopping" in my parents pantry. It could hold shoes or pillows and any odd knick-knacks lying around. And we thoroughly enjoyed it. Until....

One day it was just too much. It took up too much space. Even though it was just a mini-cart. In our room it felt like it kept expanding and soaking up our much needed oxygen. Compound that with a zebra blow-up lounger, two beds, two desks and a bigger than life sized fiberglass Ronald McDonald statue that some one had stolen from a McDonald's and it was all just a little TOO MUCH. Something had to go. Especially since it had become the dumping ground for anything we didn't want or have a place to put away. It became like that chair you put in your room so you can relax and read a good book but instead becomes the resident clothes-dumping chair that sees the light of day every few weeks for a couple of hours before it is once again consumed under cotton and wool.

So I did what any responsible person does with something they don't want anymore.

I left it outside somewhere.

So yeah Lady, I get it. Maybe it's time to lower your cost and do a short sale so you can get out from under that thing.

Let there be Peace

2010-09-12T20:49:00.002-07:00

I'm having a little bit of a personal crisis right now. I have gone through every range of emotion the past couple of weeks and I stopped just short of laying down on the bathroom floor and sobbing hysterically.

It's been really hard for me and I just don't know how to fix it.

Oh wait, I know how. Obliterate my personal demons: fruit flies.

That's right, Drosophila melanogaster as they are scientifically known. They are tormenting my life and are a constant nuisance. We have had just about zero mosquitos this year but the fruit flies are in over drive.

And the worst part? They seem to be a very narcissistic insect. I always find them on my bathroom mirror. What are they looking at? Here I come to my bathroom trying to use my mirror to stare at my pores and there they are....taunting me.

I have officially turned into the father from A Christmas Story who has the same situation going on with his furnace. You can often find me in the bathroom with the door closed banging things, whipping my towel around and clapping my hands muttering almost terrible things under my breath. They haunt me. I am constantly running around the house clapping my hands like a crazy person because no one can see what I am chasing. It kind of reminds me of the dragonfly parking lot incidence of '97 which some of you may have heard.

Humiliating. They have turned me into an obsessed, neurotic Entomophobian , or someone who is afraid of insects. Except I'm not really afraid of the fruit fly. Just obsessed with bringing about it's demise.

P.S. Just wait Jana and Stephen. You might regret having us at your house if I see some nasty bugs...

WHit-Whit-Hooray!

2010-08-23T20:41:00.006-07:00

OK, so here is the obligatory "someone came to visit" post. But it's more like a "we had a really good time and you should all know it" post.

My friend Whit came all the way from sunny San Diego to our lovely mostly clouded over Washington but we had a GREAT time anyway. If I keep telling you how much fun we had, will you believe me? Will some pictures help?

Ok.

It started with the best view of the city which I missed because I had my eyes closed

Then onto the obligatory trip to Pike's Place Market which is always a good time - especially when you come home with pounds of clams and scallops....mmmmmm.

And then while still at the market we had to see the famous "gum wall". Yeah, it's exactly how it sounds, FULL of gum. *Wretching sounds*.

Then on Saturday we headed over to Whidbey Island to see Deception Pass which is a giant, narrow, tall, skinny, scary bridge of death that Ricky and Whit decided were NOT going to make them toss their breakfast.

I on the other hand couldn't make more than 20 ft before I thought I would pass out and fall overboard into the swirling whirlpools below. I don't do heights well. At all.

We capped the view off with the biggest most delicious cinnamon and orange rolls on the island in a cute bakery overlooking the bay. Oh me-oh-my.

Then everybody got SUPER EXCITED (as evidenced by this picture) to walk along Lake Washington

And there is no better way to cap off a fun-filled vacation then hit the swings. Their faces have been covered to protect the innocent - or you could picture them wacking their noggins on the post which is what I like to do. It's a personal choice.

Also, doesn't Ricky's shadow remind you of the Air Jordan logo?

And I didn't even get around to all the delicious food we ate and ate and ate and ate. Mmmmmm. Especially the ice cream that turned Whit into an adoring fan of Ricky's mad Pac-Man skills - NEW HIGH SCORE!!!

If you come visit I promise to do some of these things with you...

The Science of Sleep - or the lack thereof

2010-08-12T18:49:00.003-07:00

Oh my, I was so cranky this morning. I just kept getting woken up WAY before my alarm was to go off. And if you know me even the slightest bit then you already know that I like to sleep, and I do NOT like to be woken up even 5 seconds before my alarm goes off. I have already allotted the perfect amount of sleep I will need and I care not to deviate from that.

And I will let you know - although somewhat groggily and unintelligibly.

And all this lack of sleep led to an email to Ricky that read: "If I have to cook dinner tonight I will kill myself ". And I meant it really dramatic. Kind of like this:

So tonight we are having Thai take-out and it looks like I'll be around to see another day.

Panic at the Disco.

2010-08-08T20:09:00.003-07:00

I panic all the time now when I'm going to the bathroom.

I have this mental checklist that I go through in a split second while I'm taking care of business; did I take my pants off? Did I take my underwear off? Am I actually on the toilet or is this a dream? Is everything making it inside the toilet?

Because every single one of those things have happened to me.

I hate it.

What should be a pleasant experience that leaves me feeling relieved has been turned into a pure panic room experience.

I feel like I've been robbed. And this panic is a pretty recent phenomenon even though it's been a couple of years since any of the aforementioned incidences.

And going #1 used to be my #2 favorite feeling after sneezing.

Creepy Crawley

2010-08-03T20:42:00.003-07:00

I keep finding giant spiders in our house and I'm afraid that we are starting to live Arachnophobia. Seriously. Not just little spiders that hop out once in a while, but BIG black spiders that like to crawl really, really fast.

And if that wasn't bad enough the last two times they have crawled out from among our clothes. What? Are they hatching eggs in my shirts? Are they mating in my socks? I'm not even afraid of spiders but even I have the hebe-ge-bees at this point. I'm hoping that it's because its been a little bit colder than usual in the mornings and that's why they are coming inside to just warm up a bit and then go back outside until winter.

Right? Tell me that is right.

Cause otherwise I'm going to have to burn all of my clothes to make sure all the eggs are set a flame and I really like my clothes. Especially all the things I've never worn because I was saving them for a "special occasion".

P.S. Totally unrelated: I caught an episode of Plain Jane on the CW while I was writing this and I may have teared up a little when the plain jane's crush liked her back and they kissed. The spiders are making me weak.

No alopecia here

2010-08-02T20:46:00.002-07:00

I have this theory that when you fly all your hair grows much faster.

I'm not sure if it's the altitude, the cabin pressure or your immune system in overload but sure enough I always have WAY more eyebrow hairs to pluck when I'm fresh off an airplane ride.

I tried to tell my friend Taradise this once while we were co-habiting a hotel room for work. "See all my new eyebrow hairs?" I said trying to sway her opinion after my long flight. But she didn't believe me. So I wavered in my theory. "Maybe it's just the extra bright lights in the bathroom that are just showing more?" I said. "Yeah, that has to be it" she assured me.

But in my heart of hearts I knew that I was on to something. So on my recent trip to the Outer Banks I shared my theory once again with my two sister-in-laws. I told them to go ahead and test it for themselves on their way home.

Sure enough I received a text from 2nd sister on her way home to Hawaii that read "You're right. My leg hair did grow faster on the plane. Weird.".

Boo-yeah. I knew I was on to something. Now if I could only develop some sort of Nair for airplanes or better yet, an airplane hair-blocker that somehow works with the cabin pressure to suppress hair growth. Naturally they would sell it exclusively in the skymall catalog which is the best. Seriously. Hours of entertainment can be found amongst it's pages. Never before have I wanted to buy SO much equipment to spy on people than when I'm perusing the skymall catalog. I also really want to get steps for the pet I don't have to be able to get on my bed, the inflatable lap pillow for long flights, a facial exerciser and the cushy gel things that wrap around your calves that kind of look like a boot. Oh, and if I had a pool I would totally buy those floating solar panels that look like blankets to keep it warm.

I want so many things...

Letter to a friend

2010-07-31T19:51:00.005-07:00

Dear Taradise,

I hear there are fires in California right now. I hear lot's of people have had to leave their homes and go elsewhere.

I know they are probably not close to you but can you smell the fire? Does it make all your clothes smell like you've been camping? Do you find yourself constantly wanting hotdogs and grilled onions? Whenever you go outside do you have to do the human rotisserie move where you rotate your body to keep warm while one side stays frigid - except you are the reverse and you try and keep one side cool while the other one threatens to singe?

Is all the smoke headed to Calabasas because smoke follows beauty? Have you done an FHE yet where everyone competes to see who can get closest to the fire? Are you blaming it all on the Governator? Or how about BP?

I'm worried about you. Mostly because I hear that flame retardant kills birds too. Do you see any dead birds?

Also, I'm very curious what 5 things you would grab on your way out the door if you had to evacuate.

Let me know how you are.

Love me

A hot mess

2010-07-26T21:35:00.002-07:00

I just got back from vacation last night. A vacation that I truly needed to save my soul even though the vacation itself almost cost me the very soul I needed to save.

It's true.

Every trainwreck of a human being deserves a break every once in a while. I can't even begin to go into detail about all of the terrible things I did to myself in the span of a week. But I can give you a condensed version.

-I realized 30 minutes before my Young Women's class that I had to teach the lesson because I read the calendar wrong.

-I forgot to do all manner of things at work during the week which included forgetting to wear a bra to work one day - a day that I had to go with the CEO to meet the head of Bank of America in Seattle. And honestly, I went through a whole hour of work before I even noticed. And then I didn't do anything about it.

-I accidentally cancelled everyone's hotel rooms for the first night of the vacation 3 days before we were supposed to leave. That's right, 5 rooms cancelled in a resort town. Awesome. I felt really good about that one.

-On the morning of the trip I awoke to find that I had set my alarm for 7 PM instead of 7 AM and had to scramble to get ready and run to the airport.

I can't remember anything else because I think I don't want to. But mostly I think I can't remember anything else because I lost SO much sleep from being terrorized by my neighbors cat.

That's right. Literally being terrorized by the feline next door. That story comes next time.

But let me report that post-vacation I'm glowing and I totally remembered to wear a bra to work today.

Up top!

Housekeeping...want me fluff your pillow?

2010-07-06T22:18:00.003-07:00

For over a week now I've been hoping to come home and open the toilet seat in my bathroom and see nothing but sparkling clean water that I would be proud to have anyone drink out of.

But alas, stay away from my toilet.

Have you ever toyed with the idea of having someone come and clean your house? Well I have. I do, actually. I'm toying with it right now. I'm just dying to take a sip of my toilet water already, alright?

But I couldn't actually do it. Even though mentally I have nothing bad to say about it. I'd be stimulating the economy and someone else's wallet. I wouldn't have to do anything myself and I'm great at word of mouth advertising if I've tried the product and love it. But I just. can't. spend the money.

I grew up in a regular house with an irregular mother who was a neat freak. Really. In fact, when she broke her foot almost 2 years ago we all said it was karma because she broke it while vacuuming a flat surface. Ha. Even though the foot-break was no laughing matter.

We had our chores and we knew them very well. Every saturday morning we had to change the sheets on our bed, clean our rooms and then tackle our respectively assigned house duties before we could do anything. That's right, no bed change and double stair vacuuming and waxing? No friends or fun. That's right, I said stair waxing once a week (I had that injustice).

I hated it. But like it or not it became a routine. A routine that stuck with me, although very loosely in college. And when I got married and really had my own place it came back full force. And I like that I kept a clean house. And up until this last move I was dutifully carrying out my saturday duties every saturday.

Then we moved. Now we have levels. Levels man. They are a whole new ball game. You clean one and then you have two more to go. What gives? My levels aren't even that spacious, they are just stacked on one another. Which means that for me my saturday cleaning rituals have been relegated to one level a week. Which means that the others stay neglected for two weeks at a time. No bueno.

But I think my toilet level is getting preferential treatment this weekend and jumping the line.

It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left ya

2010-06-30T22:22:00.002-07:00

I'm still here. I swear.

Where have I been? Let's see.

A little over a week ago I went back to Utah and went to the water park with the nephews. That's not the only reason I went - but in their minds it was. I had fun.

Monday I went to Sacramento and then came home. What a hole. Seriously. I just... I don't know what else to say about it.

On Friday I'm going to Canada. I figured what better place to celebrate our Nation's independence then across the border? They have wunderbars. Plus, all packaged food there has a french translation. It makes those famous Canadian ketchup chips c'est fancy, no?

I want to be pregnant. But let's get one thing straight: I do NOT want to have a baby. I just want to feel what it's like to be pregnant but not actually have a kid. I'm not ready for that yet. I want my own tight belly that keeps my body furnace nice and toasty.

Don't worry, I'm not going to do it. I'm not that stupid.

I want sun-kissed highlights, but I want to do them myself.

And lastly, I want me time to just be me. Ahem, Ricky. Quit coming in here and asking me questions.

Can Jersey Shore start already?

Goooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllll!!

2010-06-12T21:13:00.002-07:00

Summer is here and there is NOTHING to watch. Seriously. I have resorted to streaming the bachelorette while exercising. I hate that show. It is a veritable bag of douche-ery. But yet I still do it.

I even got Dear John from the redbox last week which I guess isn't that surprising seeing as how I watch almost everything that looks terrible. But it was SO bad. Like bleeding eyes bad. And the story made me angry - like literally angry. I threw a freshly matched pile of socks at Ricky to emphasis my rage. Why would you EVER marry someone just because you felt sorry for them? Especially when there is HOT soldier pinning after you halfway around the world? Ugh. It disgusted me and is now my second most hated movie after A walk to remember starring my least favorite person ever, Mandy Moore. Seriously. Sure kids, get married just so you can have sex and not feel guilty about it before you die. It sounds like the human version of a story my friend Stasy once told me; her sister lets her animals have a sexual escapade before she fixes them. Really? Really.

My only saving grace right now is the World Cup. I love it. Love, love, love it. It is the only time I read the sports section of the paper or watch ESPN (if I had cable). I love a dose of healthy competition amongst countries where it is ok to occasionally yell slurs of all kinds at the tv. Soccer games have an energy to them that no other sport comes close to possessing. Sure, hockey fans throw octopus on the ice, baseball has streakers and basketball has celebrities courtside but soccer has stabbings, riots and deadly trampling. I kind of imagine that's what the Roman arenas felt like when the gladiators were fighting to the death but with less air horns.

Plus, soccer games have the added bonus of WAG's or wives and girlfriends of the players. They are just as entertaining as the games, if not more. Starring my favorite WAG of all time: Victoria Beckham of course. Sometimes when they show pictures of the WAG's at the games I find myself wondering, was there a confusion over what type of venue they thought they were going too or did they just come straight from a non-stop night of clubbing? If they aren't careful they could encounter some Waglash (no, I didn't make that up).

Did anyone see the U.S. vs. England today? Am I alone in my World Cup loving?

Rainy days and weekdays....and weekends

2010-06-06T22:33:00.002-07:00

I had a touch of the melancholies tonight. It's been raining here for over a week and it's beginning to get to me. I made it through all the rainstorms of the winter without experiencing very much of the gloominess everyone said would plague me. It was winter, the weather is bad most places. As long as it didn't snow I was happy.

But it's JUNE for crying out loud! And the rain outside today wasn't a pleasant pitter patter against my roof, it was sheets of rain coming down the windows which made it seem like I was living in a constant car wash but without all the fun brushing action and noises that come with that.

And it's not like when it snows in the mountains in June in Utah. C'mon, who cares? It's in the MOUNTAINS people, not your back yard.

And the weird thing is we hardly ever have thunder and lightning like a normal rainstorm. The rain here prefers to be a little bit of a wall flower amongst natures storms I guess.

It brings back memories of being little and sitting on the porch with my dad when there were big thunder storms. We would just sit there and smell the rain and count one-one thousand, two-one thousand, etc. every time we would see lightning until the thunder hit figuring out how far away it was. It always freaked me out a little bit when I didn't get past one-one..... And my dad would tell me what his mother used to tell him; the thunder was just the sound of the angels in heaven playing with bowling balls and when the balls collided they made a huge thunder down below. Which is a WAY better story than vampires playing baseball. Honestly, why baseball? Why not something cool like jai alai?

I guess what I'm trying to say is I need some Vitamin D and I miss you.

Dress for Less

2010-06-01T20:21:00.004-07:00

I feel like every time I go to a Ross I come home and exclaim "now THAT'S the worst Ross I've ever been to". I've said this twice in the last month. And it seems that they get progressively worse over time but yet, I still go.

But this last one truly may have been the WORST. I went there as a split second decision while out shopping yesterday. I had been searching high and low for curtains for our living room that are patterned and not going to blow up my wallet. But I just couldn't find the right ones.

So I had this brilliant idea (if I do say so myself) to look at the table clothes and see if something suited my fancy. Well they did indeed suit my fancy and then some. I found the cutest fabric and in the perfect size. All I had to do was sew the top edge over a couple of inches to make a loop for the curtain rod and Voila! Curtains!

But it was what I had to go through to get them that make them truly great. The Ross was PACKED that day my friends. Packed. With screaming children and smelly people. People from all over God's green earth were hunting the aisles for bargains - some so deep in search that they let the toy section be their nanny. Children were running around everywhere opening all the boxes and dragging everything across the floor. And where were the employees you might ask? Puh-lease. This is Ross. They don't do that.

So there I was trying to dodge the dodgey and just get to the tablecloths when it began. EVERY aisle I turned down produced someone with a hacking cough or uncontrollable sneezing attack. I could not escape it. I felt the germs showering down around me crowding into my nostrils. And just like an airplane, I new those confined spaces were going to get me. I was going to get whatever they had.

I felt just like this...

Snooze Fest

2010-05-22T16:05:00.002-07:00

I woke up (after the second time) this morning with the best intentions.

"I have SO much to do" I announced to Ricky. Then I rattled off a list of all the things I had on my plate to do today.

And I started my list. I cleaned my bathroom and the bathroom downstairs and put some laundry in.

Then I sat down on the couch to eat my delicious toast and egg over easy while watching some deleted scenes from freaks and geeks.

After which I felt tired and promptly fell asleep on the couch.

Then I ate some vitamins and tried to resume my list. I changed the laundry and then it was time to eat lunch. I made a delicious curry chickpea and leek salad and then I did do some more laundry. But most of the time I just watched tv on my computer.

And I don't feel bad in the slightest. This is the saturday I've been dreaming about for weeks. I need to catch up on being lethargic. It feels good. Really, really good. And I'm not answering my phone either. Try me.

And tonight we are going out for the "best Mole in Seattle".

So I'll probably take another nap before AND after that too.

The scarlet letter

2010-05-13T22:11:00.003-07:00

So today when I got to work I noticed a little sticky note attached to a file folder on my desk.

It was from my boss who is the CEO of the company, in case I forgot (it said in parenthesis).

It was a little odd. I wasn't sure what to make of it. Was it a bad joke? So I threw it in the recycling bin under my desk and forgot about it.

Much later that afternoon I was replacing the toner in one of our printers and he came mozying by. "Oh, I'm so tired today" he yawned.

"Well, it's the afternoon and that happens" I replied.

"Yeah, I went out last night and drank some wine with one of my friends. Then I decided to come to the office later that night and get my mail. Did I ......... write you a note? He inquired a little sheepishly.

"Yup" I said.

"Oh, was it a little weird?"

"Yes siree" I answered with my most non-chalant voice.

And that's it. The moment I got the upper hand.

So did I keep the note?

You know it.

Over-easy

2010-05-11T23:35:00.003-07:00

Why are french fries so awesome? No really, this is not a rhetorical question. Why?

Every time I eat them I wonder why I don't eat them more. So simple and so perfect. My family in Spain eats them everyday. No really, every day. Although to be fair they cook theirs in olive oil. It doesn't matter what the main meal consists of it will always be accompanied with french fries. Always.

Chicken? French fries. Fish? French fries. Beef? French fries. Stew? French fries. It is the one common denominator of their meals. You can even get hot french fries out of a vending machine in some parts of Spain. No joke.

Not only that, but every meal consists of a starch (potatoes) and a carb (bread). Otherwise it just wouldn't be a meal. Doesn't that sound great?

In fact, my 96 year old Abuela is SO used to having a piece of bread at every meal to help her load her food onto her fork that I once witnessed her using an eggroll at a Chinese restaurant to push her fried rich onto her fork. She held that eggroll the entire meal in her left hand while she ate and used it as a utensil. Talk about adapting to a new environment.

So tonight for dinner we had french fries (and I snuck a few sweet potato fries in there as well) with fried eggs - a favorite of my mom's family and me.

Hits the spot everytime.

Music to my ears - NOT

2010-05-09T22:10:00.003-07:00

Holy Crap. One day Ricky decided to do something on my computer machine and therefore had to take off anything and everything that was in my computer and put it into some other time capsule and then re-put it all back after he tinkered with all the parts. And because of this all the playlists on my iTunes were deleted.

I want to stab someone.

And now whenever I want to listen to music when getting ready in the morning or window shopping online I can never find what I want to listen to. Which is how I ended up first trying to listen to Ben Folds Five, then Cheap Trick and now I'm on to Coldplay and over that too. Playlists are essential for me. I make them according to whatever mood I'm in and right now that mood is frustrated.

And sure, I could make some more but I'm too lazy. Honestly, I made all those lists when I was single and I can't muster the strength anymore. Dinner wipes me out people. I'm thinking of installing a fainting couch next to the kitchen when I just.can't. take it anymore. Right now I just use the floor which is infinitely better since we are back to carpet.

And if you were to look at my iTunes you would understand why I can't just put it on random. It's full of crap. I mean I have Ludacris next to Luis Miguel. Why do I even have Luis Miguel? I've never listened to it - oh that's right, thanks Josh. When I first got an ipod I had my friend Josh (Mo's better half) give me some music but by some freaky friday incident or the fact that we clicked the wrong button I got ALL his music which really brought about this down fall because I listen to about 20% of what he gave me. But I'm too tired to go through and delete things. But wait, that's not entirely true. One day I got just enough wind to delete the Les Miserable soundtrack and all the Rolling Stones because I hate them both SO much. Yeah, I've never seen Les Miserable's and so I don't like it. Get over it. Oh, and while we are on the subject I've never seen the movie Titanic and I don't plan on it. How do you like that? Look, if you are going to protest then take your pick: Les Miserables, Titanic or reading the Twilight books, what's it gonna be? I'm too tired for more than one (and don't say Titanic because NO).

The funny thing is that Josh and I are almost the same person except for the fact that as much as I have tried I really just don't like Mogwai. I need words and I'm not entirely sure who they are anyway.

So long story even longer Ricky, you are the reason I now watch "It's always sunny in Philadelphia" while getting ready for work so I don't have to run back to the computer every minute and 20 seconds to change the song to something I actually like.

Which is why I don't really feel bad that I told you in the car this morning that it's been too long since I got a present.

Love you so much.

Wall paper

2010-05-02T22:13:00.004-07:00

We have all these new walls in our new house and now we have to figure out what to do with them.

But Ricky is sick. Sick with a nasty virus. I web MD'd him and it turns out he has the "I only like what I like" virus. It's really hard to get rid of. I've decided the only cure is for me to first barrage him so long that he gives in and if that doesn't work then I'll have to go behind his back.

It's really the only way.

I want this picture by Georgia O'Keefe somewhere in the house:

I just love it - and I love poppies too.

Mark my words, when you come and visit you will find it somewhere. Even if I have to drug him with the very thing in this picture...opium.

But don't worry, it's not all head butting around here. We made a major milestone when I got him to agree that botanical prints aren't always "grandma".

Don't you love it?

Now will someone please explain to me why illustrations of plants cost so much money? E-gads.

Cross Country

2010-04-17T17:27:00.003-07:00

Hey everybody, this lady came all the way from Chicago to see me (and everyone else in her family who all live here)! And she flew with the worlds most active toddler and new baby....can someone get her a cold beverage and place to put her feet up? My hero.

Don't be fooled by this picture though. Chicago is only this nice for about 2 weeks a year. You're either fighting to stay alive and not lose any appendages to frost bite or dying of heat exhaustion and the eventual consuming of your remains by mosquitos.

You should got visit!

Bite Me

2010-04-14T23:14:00.002-07:00

It seems that I incurred the wrath of the animal kingdom this week. Why? I watch Life. I appreciate and fear all things animal - especially Hippos because did you know they are actually really dangerous and want to kill you? Yeah.

We were over at a friends house Monday night and his kitty, if you can call the killer that, decided to deceive me by being all lovable and soft and then after a few minutes decided that I was now prey and began to bite me. And as I watched she did it to everyone else. Including our friend who feeds and houses it - which now explains the scars all over his hands. What? Isn't there a cat whisperer somewhere who can help?

Then on Tuesday I went to another friends house to plan a baby shower and their puppy was so excited to see me that it piddled all over the floor. Once again it was so loving and cuddly and then the switch happened. It began to naw on me and when I made her stop she turned to chewing my shoes with my feet still in inside. What? And when that was stopped she began chewing on my gorgeous grey sweater coat. Not OK. But what are you supposed to do? You are at someone's house being attacked by their animal, it's not like you can kick it.

Or can you?

You may think its cute that your dog is chewing on my sweater and has destroyed your pillows and defecated on the floor but I just go into terminator mode in my head and through my eyes I see the target in night vision and begin to seek and destroy. If your animal can't behave itself when company comes over then put it in a different room. Unless you don't want anyone to come over anymore and voila! As you wish.

And to make matters worse Ricky waited until the next day to notify me that "cat scratch fever" is actually a really serious disease that you can catch. And to think all these years I just thought Ted Nugent was really creative - which he still is. Hello, he's Ted Nugent.

Adieu

2010-04-05T19:35:00.002-07:00

Well.........

We are off to St. Lucia!!!

And no, we had our tickets BEFORE the bachelor aired. Gross.

My vitamin D quotient is about to get off the hook!

Yeee-OWWWW

2010-04-01T23:20:00.005-07:00

Tonight I payed someone to humiliate me.

And it was painful - literally.

I got sugared. Not sure what that is? Click here.

I've been waxed before and every time I had something on, mine or theirs. So this time I had something on and she came in and said..."no honey, nothing from the waist down".

O-kay.

Oh the lights. The lights illuminating everything.

All in the name of this:

It was so bad I needed my favorite thai noodles to restore my soul a little bit. It barely helped.

And no, I don't think I will ever get used to it. I like to keep to myself.

Yup.

2010-03-18T22:12:00.002-07:00

I did some embarrassing things today.

At a place full of other people.

I was at a marketing conference for work at the local posh sports club/events center downtown. I was there to get a little experience and meet some people.

Long story short I flung my dirty lunch knife into my purse on the floor without knowing because I was too busy stuffing my starving face. I didn't figure it out until the guy it narrowly missed sitting next to me retrieved it and put it back on the table next to me. I like to keep our sponsors on their toes - or maybe cut off their toes.

And the next one was bad. I had been having a little.....gas. And I had been releasing it in small quantities quietly sitting by myself in the back. No harm, no foul. It was like Iocane powder - odorless, tasteless and dissolved instantly. Anyway, 15 min before the close of the conference it happened. You guessed it. It was audible. Short and loud. And there was no one sitting next to me. Only the people around me heard and I totally tried to play it off like it wasn't me. I actually made a big deal of making a really offended face like it was someone by me and I was grossed out. Whatever, they knew. They all knew.

Mortified.

Love thy neighbors as thyself

2010-03-08T21:50:00.003-07:00

I was driving home with Ricky yesterday and I asked him, "Is this city making me a different person"?

And I didn't mean in a good way.

Seattle has many wonderful things to offer the human spirit. It's green and the weather is temperate. There are 3 professional sports teams here and access to the ocean with it's abundance of seafood for me to eat. There is fabulous shopping and whale watching and the city itself is totally walkable, which is wonderful. If you want to eat all the multiple grains of the world you have them all at your fingertips and people here actually use reusable shopping bags. And I have said time and time again that giving birth and being a mother in Seattle must be amazing because you have every sort of birthing program your heart could desire. Also, the mothers here wear WHATEVER they want - attractive or not. Awesome.

But...

It rains a lot in winter (which actually hasn't been that bad), people get mad if you don't use a reusable shopping bag (true story) and there are a lot of people who don't shave - male and female. It's a bit pricey to live here and lately people have been picking off our police force which is no bueno for anyone. And all the neighborhoods have pockets of good and bad which gets really confusing when looking for housing.

The last bit of that is why I think Seattle is making me a not so good person. We happen to live in a medium part. A cool neighborhood that is up and coming. The problem with that is we are between the up part and the coming part. We sort of live in the hood...sort of. And I find myself just judging every hoodlum that hangs out on our street corner. I have no hope for them. Not one part of me wants to help them in any way when I look into their vacant eyes. I just wish they would go away. I don't care where, just away from here.

I don't like feeling like that.

It's such a pessimistic view. I've never thought of myself that way. I'm a realist, but an optimistic one. I'm wondering if the way I feel is just a bi-product of living in a big city or if it really is just me.

Don't look at me

2010-03-03T22:45:00.003-07:00

They say that eyes are the window to the soul.

If that is true then I say eyebrows are the windows to your face.

And my eyebrows are sending mixed messages.

Should we go up or down? Right or left? Curl or not curl?

They can't get it right - and neither can I.

Because I am afflicted with what can only be described as "parental halfsies" (one side of my body reflects my mother, the other side reflects my dad. To be more specific: Left side mom, right side dad) I have had an awful time getting the eyebrows to reflect their close genetic link.

My left eyebrow is lovely and curves elegantly at just the right place. The hairs tend to group nicely and evenly making a very aesthetically pleasing picture. My right eyebrow on the other hand is very unruly. Just imagine having one of YOUR dad's eyebrows on your face.

No bueno.

It requires all my time and attention and it's just a distraction really.

I'm now considering having them "shaped" in hopes that someone else might be able to do what I never could: make my face windows shine!

I'm so sick of looking at myself in pictures and seeing what can only be described as thin koosh balls on my face.

A pat on the back

2010-02-26T17:59:00.003-07:00

I had a 90 day performance review yesterday. For some reason I was really nervous - even though my boss had taken me out for lunch at the market in December to tell me what a good job I was doing. I just couldn't stop wondering if somehow I had ceased to do a good job. That maybe I had dropped the ball on...something.

But it was a glowing report. I mean, I think I actually blushed - in a business meeting. I was on cloud 9 afterwards.

You just might not understand, so let me help you. I used to get fired from jobs. Restaurant jobs. Although to be honest, who hasn't been fired from a restaurant? Oh yeah, my friend Mo. She actually left a note one time on the hostess station at the restaurant we were serving at together. It read:

Dear boss,

I quit.

She made it out, but not unscathed. I remember the aforementioned boss making her cry once because he hated her hair that day. Yeah. I don't feel bad that I was sacked from that place.

The point is. I am a MUCH different kind of person now. It was easy to tell the change was happening when I stopped celebrating one year work anniversaries.

I even added another resolution: squeeze my butt more when I walk.

How adult is that? BOO+YEAH!!

Big What?

2010-02-16T22:51:00.007-07:00

I felt like posting something today but I went back and forth and back and forth once again on what to write about. So then I decided to let the indecision get the best of me.

So I decided to prepare some things for an activity tomorrow and do some online window shopping. That led to some blog reading and then some Craigslist perusing which is where I found this gem amongst the HD TV's:

5 Sasquatch Documentary Bigfoot Private Research Collection - $50 (WA)

Curious? You should be. Read more here.

I've always wondered about Sasquatch and now I know I'm not the only one - by far. There is a whole group in Washington devoted to finding him or it or even a she?

This of course led me to a gem of a movie from my childhood about this very same subject. And Mr. Henderson handled the whole situation just how I would have, have a look.

Which they made fun of brilliantly on 30 Rock.

Which led me on to remember the funny commercials a couple of years ago - here is one (okay all) of my favorites.

You just can't go wrong with this subject.

Happy ME day!

2010-02-14T22:42:00.003-07:00

Well it seems that no one will be writing a post praising all my many virtues today on my Birthday so it looks like I will have to do it myself. Actually, in the interest of full disclosure Ricky did post this, which was pretty thoughtful. Notice the word fully. It's pretty poignant seeing as how more than a few times I've threatened to put his favorite Steve Jobs apparatus to rest...permanently.

Back to me and why I'm lucky to have myself as...myself. I'm fiercely loyal to myself and you if you are in the inner circle - and I put on mascara everyday. I love my Birthday and yours too (if I can remember it). I will always be excited when anyone is opening a present. I will tell you that whatever you are doing/saying/wearing or thinking about naming your kid is great even if that is not what I really think because I like to make you feel good about your choices even if they are not for me.

I'm a great employee now. Emphasis on the now. Even if you ask me to make more coffee and I really think that's beneath me I will do it with a smile because I'm grateful to have a job now. I am OK if someone buys the same thing I'm wearing after seeing it because really that is a compliment and we both would still know that I got it first. Also, I seemed to have inherited a small part of my mothers supernatural gift for finding a-m-a-z-i-n-g things for dirt cheap.

I'm a great wife. You should be so lucky.

But most importantly if you are sad I will buy you candy. If you break up with someone I will cook you dinner. If you stay the night I will cook you multiple meals and show you the meaning of food is love (good food, not crap).

And I will tell you I love you, even if we aren't quite "there" yet. This is new for me.

So basically, I am SO blessed that you all have me.

Hip Hip Hooray!

2010-02-05T22:35:00.002-07:00

Ricky is snoring in the other room...right now. Which he doesn't do very often which is good because then he would be single. I hope the sound of Travis wafting from my, I mean our, bedroom doesn't wake him. The band Travis, not another man named Travis. As if.

I finally got around to making my New Year's resolution yesterday: Drink more water. And today I realized that maybe my resolution this year should be two fold; drink more water AND do more Kegel exercises. Because my bladder cannot keep up with the sudden surge in business.

I shared my good news with my co-worker who said "wait! That's MY New Year's resolution! You stole mine". So I did, but it was unconsciously which absolves me from any bad karma. I guess that it was stuck in my subconscious floating around somewhere and it came back for a visit. I'm starting to think that Karma is indeed coming back to me because I have had to use spell check an inordinate amount of times in this post so far. This can't possibly be all me. And no, I spelled inordinate all by myself, thank you.

Today I was going strong with my goal of drinking more water (specifically one 16oz bottle before lunch and one before leaving work - followed by infinity trips to the loo) and I decided to jazz up my afternoon bottle with a delicious Crystal light pink lemonade on the go packet. I don't like that particular flavor full force so I had some left over and a thought occurred (since when did that word have 2 r's?) to me. This looks almost like a pixie stick. So I poured a little into my palm and tasted it. Mmmm. Tart yet very good. So I went full throttle and poured straight from the source and let me tell you... it is NOT like a pixie stick. Especially when there is lemon in the title. Yuuuuck. I think it dried up part of my eyeballs.

The things you do when you are bored of listening to the people on the other side of the glass learning about bank financial statements. I tell ya.

Ain't nothin like the real thing baby

2010-01-24T18:22:00.002-07:00

I blame Motown for a lot of things but especially for making the best music ever and then never being able to repeat it.

But mostly I'm blaming Motown for making my day yesterday a little less than productive.

I started an Al Green station (one of my favorites) on Pandora the other day at work and I haven't been able to stop. So naturally when I got out of the shower yesterday and was looking for some tunes I turned that on.

Then things went down hill.

I took me f-o-r-e-v-e-r to get dressed because I had to burst into spontaneous dancing bouts both standing and sitting in the chair. I couldn't help it.

And the whole goal of yesterday was trekking to the grocery store...finally. But even that was delayed because I had to download 4 CD's of Motown's greatest hits so it could keep me company in the car.

And then I didn't want to get out of the car.

It also helped me cooked dinner - for hours.

Send me your address and I'll help you be less productive too.

I promise.

Whada ya say doll?

2010-01-19T17:02:00.002-07:00

The Crazies were out today! So much so that I actually turned around my wedding ring on the train ride home.

It started with a rather interesting woman sitting by who told me she needed her inhaler. I said nothing.

Then she yelled, "HEY! You almost hit me!" to the woman who walked past her who did not almost hit her.

Then she mumbled and stared and mumbled some more.

Finally she got up and moved when another homeless looking man sat across from her. And from where she moved I could hear a chorus of expletives followed by something about someone always blowing a saxophone in her face and how she does NOT like it.

I thought I was home free.

Then a man came on and sat across me and proceeded to harass me.

"Whhhaada ya say doll?" He started with.

Then when I looked the other way he said it again. When I still didn't answer he apologized for being so drunk and slid a seat over. And boy was he ever drunk. I think the people one car over could smell him.

2 seconds later he started again. "Whooo gives you the right to sit there with thooose boxes and look so good" he slurred. "What are you I-taliano?". And then another apology.

Then the classic, "You don't who I am. My family has money". Sure. I'm sure that your family has money sir, now I will go home with you. Gross.

You may be wondering why I didn't just move seats. Well, the answer is two-fold. 1-there weren't that many empty seats and 2-I had these two huge boxes to take home and this was the place they fit best.

He kept going and going and at one point he told me I was "as dumb as they come". All the while I am looking in the opposite direction trying to ignore him whilst sending negative thoughts towards him in my brain.

Finally a stop before mine I couldn't take it anymore and I got up with my huge boxes and stood by the door. He followed and started talking to the homeless man and they were both agreeing how the cops could f*** themselves. I seriously worried he would get off at my stop but luckily he didn't.

At first it was amusing, then funny and then eventually a wee bit scary.

And then I relived it as I schlepped the 6 blocks home juggling the big boxes worrying someone was going to jump me for my goods.

Oooh...living the sweet city life. What did you do today?

Evian

2010-01-17T19:56:00.004-07:00

I've been drinking old water lately.

I always get thirsty right at the same time every morning after the same yogurt and grape nuts I always eat.

So I get a big glass and fill it full of mostly cold water and drink it as I keep getting ready. It inevitably ends up on the desk in the bedroom and I rarely finish it all.

Then the next day I'm suddenly thirsty and there it is. Old water full of the bubbles that water gets when it sits out.

As a self-processed non-water snob I drink it anyways because it's still water, right? It can't have gone bad necessarily, even though it tastes a little old.

But today I woke up from my nap and I was SO thirsty (thanks to a side affect of my birth control that I had no idea about until recently) and I needed a drink, like, now. I looked over and there it was. My camelback water bottle full of water that had been sitting there for weeks. So I gulped it down.

It wasn't that bad. But I kept thinking about someone I know who won't drink old water. Is it you? And then I thought about one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies names Superstar: "You should be embarrassed because your parents named you after bottled water!".

As a side note - My husband is video chatting with his brother from the bathroom. No good can possibly come of this.

Location, location, location

2010-01-16T18:12:00.002-07:00

Sometimes I wonder how much of a snob I am.

I mostly feel like a snob when it comes to looking for new housing. Also when it comes to fake designer bags from China. I'm just not interested. I'm past that point in my life - and I have TJ Maxx which serves my real leather bags interest just fine.

My point is this: Today I sat in the car while Ricky went and meet someone we had an apt showing with. I refused to get out of the car and even acknowledge that we were there. I sat in the car and waited until Ricky was done and came back out.

You don't understand. It was this long street full of shanty duplexes with all sorts of crap in the yards. Crap everywhere. And it seemed like all the windows were covered in sheets. I have a thing about that. Get a curtain. Or at least a sheet without prints that gives it away.

I just didn't want to be there.

And now we are back to the same place we were 6 months ago. Do we pay a little more for something we will really like or pay way less for less space just to save some money?

I vote the first one.

I can see clear now, the clouds disappear

2010-01-15T22:41:00.002-07:00

OK, I can tell by the lack of comments on that last post that my wish has finally come true and no one is reading this. Although I do feel bad that nobody got to click on the link I included and experience the joy to be found there.

But it doesn't really matter because it just kind of goes with my new decade. 2010 has started off on the er, wonky side of the foot. It hasn't been necessarily that bad, but it hasn't been that good either.

My car is growing mold.

I left my prized hair straightener in Utah.

I busted open my rain boots.

I forgot to put in a certain lady part apparatus that stops you up...twice. Which brought about some consequences of it's own.

My visiting teaching companion refused to take me home and ditched me at church - Well...actually she honked and honked while I stood at the locked door until the lone man doing genealogy came and let me in. Thank heavens for the lone man because Ricky wasn't answering his phone, arg. But it did give me plenty of time to catch up on my August 2000 New Era articles. Hey Saudi Arabia Stake Young Women, where are you all now?

I changed at the last minute before heading out the door to go to work and once I was at work I noticed you could totally see my bra through my shirt.

And then later that day I set a paper towel on fire in the break room trying to retrieve my co-workers cookie from the toaster oven.

I think all of this is some sort of a cosmic consequence for not making a new years resolution for the first time in a long time. Actually, my resolution this year was to get a resolution. Which hasn't worked by the way. I feel sort of like a failure because I didn't fulfill my last resolution to try all different types of lettuce to the fullest. I have yet to buy endive.

C'mon. Total Failure.

So that's about it for now. It feels good to let it all out, even if no one is going to read this.

Mary...what about the spores?

2010-01-08T18:23:00.002-07:00

Ok.

So it's no secret that it rains a lot where I live.

Duh.

But it was a secret to me, until now, what all this rain was really going to do - besides ruin my shoes and frizz my hair.

I didn't realize that it was going to grow things. Fuzzy things.

Patches of fuzzy things where there shouldn't be any.

I opened my car door today and saw a patch of green mold growing on my car. ON my car.

On metal. I didn't even know that was possible. But it goes nicely with the mold I recently discovered on the shower curtain.

They say everything comes in three's so I'm getting ready to find another mold patch. I just hope that I don't find it on myself because THAT... I do know can happen.

And it's not like I can be the boy in the Secret Garden and avoid going outside to escape the spores - no, mine grow inside and out.

Tonight

2010-01-05T00:47:00.003-07:00

Sometimes you feel on top of things and very in charge.

Then sometimes you find yourself using paper towels in lieu of toilet paper. (that reminds me, I once watched something that said you needed at least 7 sheets of t.p. between you and your hand to keep the germs at bay. I think about that every time. Every time).

The lives of others

2009-12-12T00:30:00.002-07:00

Sometimes I wish that nobody ever reads my blog.

Then I could talk about things I actually want to talk about: my dislikes.

But chances are that you participate in one of my dislikes and I worry about offending you - even though in my head I might be thinking that that giant flora on your head should be reserved for babies and Karo syrup.

I don't know.

Also, I like to write stories about people that I never want them to read. I want to observe them and record it for posterity. I am certainly no good at keeping a diary of my own life but I am watching you and just waiting for you to mess up so I can tell everyone.

But it's not as diabolic as it sounds. I don't do an evil laugh and it's not to make you feel like an idiot; I just want to share your funny moment with others, without you knowing.

And also, if you are wearing a new thing they call a "collar" just stop. Don't do it.

Stop reading this.

(Although now that I've said it you aren't going to. It's the equivalent of "don't look!" Blast.)

Hear Ye, Hear Ye

2009-12-08T22:26:00.002-07:00

Heard in the car the other day:

Ricky: "You being pregnant is going to be horrible".

Thanks. Actually, I kind of felt relieved that he maybe got the fact that I might actually be horrible if I was pregnant and that would help him to not want kids yet.

And then today we talked about how we don't have a "married blog". We just don't. Neither of us care and frankly, we just have different styles - Mine is good.

We are two ships sailing in the night side by side, but not touching.

You can do it

2009-12-06T21:27:00.003-07:00

We were watching an episode of "This American Life" where a father was waiting for his son to get home from Iraq. And he was waiting with his wife and all sorts of other families and friends waiting for their loved ones. And that's when it hit me.

Am I going to have to do this?

I have seen scenes like this over and over on TV full of tearful reunions and even more tears of reunions that will never be. But it never hit me until the other night that my future might be just like that.

Ricky signed up for the Air Force. A decision that he pondered long and hard over and one that we fought long and hard over as well. I didn't want to have anything to do with the military and especially if it involved my husband in it. In my mind it was something necessary for our country but I wanted it to be far away from me.

But in the end when he and then subsequently me, realized what his education was going to cost we decided that no, we did NOT want to "buy" a house that we would never see. It was just too overwhelming to imagine taking on that kind of debt if we could avoid it.

So he applied and he actually got it which was an honor really because they don't give out the Air Force scholarships like candy. And it hasn't really changed our lives except for the monthly deposit which is made into our banking account to help with expenses. He doesn't have to do anything until he graduates but then we give them 3 years of our life.

With the way things are going and how they will probably continue on like this for a while it is almost guaranteed he will go somewhere (even though everyone assures us the Air Force has it better than everyone else).

Am I going to be waiting for a bus one day holding balloons and a welcome home sign?

I don't want to.

I hear you

2009-11-22T23:26:00.002-07:00

I've been sooooo busy. So busy that I tend to get lost in thought and not listen to anyone else. I realized this about 2 weeks ago when I was sitting on the couch next to Ricky who was telling me something pretty interesting involving some process in the human body and I had this moment where I just looked at him and saw his mouth moving but I had no idea what he was saying.

I had no idea what he was saying.

And then again today as we were walking into the apt after church he was saying something to me but it was like a movie where I'm inside my own head and everything else is silent.

I've just been thinking too much lately - and not about myself which is a bummer. I have A LOT of people to think about right now. A Lot of people with bigger problems than I have.

But I feel bad because I just haven't been listening.

So I pledge here to listen better to Ricky tell me all about the vomiting reflex. Or to you and your bad dog/day/job or stupid sister/brother and how they didn't buy you a present off your approved Christmas list.

And if you come and talk to me in person I promise to make you a treat and I'll even sweep the floor before you come over. Just wear your rain boots because you CANNOT believe how much it rains now.

Everyday. That's how much it rains.

Everyday.

If the Chemistry's correct

2009-11-19T23:21:00.004-07:00

I was coming home from work yesterday and I decided to stop at the bakery to pick up a fresh walnut baguette to go with dinner.

After I bought my small baguette I left the bakery and walked to the street light and waited for my turn to cross. In the mean time another women left the bakery, grabbed her two dogs that were waiting outside and she joined me at the stop light.

And then she turned to me and said "are you a chemist?"

"Excuse me?" I asked not sure that I had heard her right.

"Are you a chemist?" she asked again.

"No, I am not" I replied, almost laughing.

"Have you taken any chemistry classes?" she asked.

"Um....yeah. In high school" I said with a chuckle.

"Oh, I guess that won't help me" she said. "I want to take a chemistry class and I don't know if I'm going to take the right one or if I can handle it or what".

"Yup, sorry. I cannot help you there".

And with that we both proceeded to cross the street and go our separate ways. Of all the things people on the street have said to me that was by far the most interesting. I guess I'm kind of flattered that she thought I might be a chemist. After all, I am very good at producing... reactions.

Blah

2009-11-10T22:05:00.001-07:00

I got nothin.

Except for the fact that I have tomorrow off for Veteran's day. I love getting bank holidays.

Boo-yeah.

Hair today, Gone tomorrow

2009-11-04T21:52:00.003-07:00

I was engrossed in typing something on the computer yesterday and suddenly my ears tuned back into reality and I heard The Cure playing. It just snuck up on me and I did NOT like it. I don't think The Cure is a good band for playing out of nowhere when you are not expecting it. It is the kind of thing you play conscientiously - at least I do. We should surprise the Taliban by blasting The Cure out of nowhere and maybe they will surrender like Noriega. But luckily a song of theirs did come on that I actually like and I cooked dinner to it.

I made lemonade people, lemonade.

I also don't like it when male pattern baldness sneaks up on me. Well, not really to me but to those around me. From where I am perched everyday at work I see people coming in and out of the office next door all day. LOT'S of people. Lot's of young males and a couple hot females (real estate, go figure). And my co-worker has a thing for one of the guys next door. And today when I saw him leave the office I saw it...

BAM! Maybe a little baldness. Or maybe it's too much hair gel forming un-normal separation? I'm torn. Do I tell her?

Pants

2009-10-29T21:47:00.004-07:00

I did something weird the other day: I wore my husbands pants to the grocery store. I came home from work and went into the bedroom contemplating what I could change into to head out to the store. And then I saw them laying all unassuming on top of the duvet. They are the perfect shade of blue-ish grey denim. And I knew that I wanted to wear them. And even though I knew they were going to be too big I put them on anyways. Sure enough they were baggy on my derriere and legs, but at least they didn't slide off when I moved.

I examined myself in the mirror: front, side, back, side, front, back, side, front, side. "Not too bad" I thought to myself. People will think that I am just dressing a little Japan-ese. But just to make sure I slipped on a pair of black ballet flats to class it up a bit.

I was really excited to get home to see the husbands reaction when he discovered that I stole his pants. We carried in the groceries. I made dinner and walked around the house A LOT. We ate dinner together and then I blurted out "don't you notice anything different about me today?". Nope. He looked me up and down and still didn't get it. So I narrowed it down to my clothing. Still nothing.

Then he asked me if I peed my pants.

"No......but if I did YOU would be really mad".

Nothing.

So he starts to get frustrated and ask me if I did all number of things in my pants, which I did not, but always answered that he would be VERY upset if I had done any of those things in my pants.

It took forever until I finally had to stand up and show him the pants. Duh.

"They look like some of your other pants" he replied.

Come to think of it they do.

OH BOY!

2009-10-26T22:51:00.002-07:00

Oberto.

If you had any doubts about visiting me I want you to know the factory outlet is 5 min away.

Me time

2009-10-22T21:46:00.004-07:00

Tonight Ricky was gone learning how to monitor fetuses so I decided to have a little alone time. I started by enjoying a delicious dinner of Golden Grahams straight out of the box while shopping online. When I was done checking all my usual sites and planning how to peruse my favorite designer sale early enough to still make work on time I decided to entertain my senses with the latest episode of Gossip Girl. I was not disappointed - Vanessa, how could you? Serena, will anyone ever truly love you?

And after the show I looked at nails and they were truly in need of some attention. So I removed the old polish whilst perusing netflix until I found the perfect movie. And I found a classic I had never seen before that was begging to be watched while I painted: Tootsie. You know, the one where Dustin Hoffman dresses in drag to get an acting gig? It features a bunch of famous actors when they were young; Jessica Lange, Bill Murray, Geena Davis and Punky Brewster's Dad!. Has anyone ever actually watched Tootsie? What a perfect movie for watching by yourself while you paint your nails.

And even though the movie was good I found myself truly captivated by Stephen Bishop who wrote the theme song for Tootsie. I looked him up on youtube and decided that he's alright. And I think I have a thing for his songs now. I know, what? But here is one of my favorites that I would like to share with you.

It just makes me want to fire up the stove and start sauteing in my palazzo pants. Mmmm..delish. Enjoy. (Cause I did on repeat while I wrote this).

Traaaaaaaallllllaaaaaaaaaaaaa

2009-10-20T22:49:00.003-07:00

I have to go to bed in 10 minutes because that's when I go to bed. And I can't think of this particular opera song that keeps going through my head. So instead I'm now listening to La Boheme because it's good too.

Every time I listen to opera I feel like I need to do something grandios, like people who are bi-polar. No offense. Plus, it reminds me of my dad and I like him too.

And I think I also really like La Boheme because that is the opera Nicholas Cage takes Cher to in Moonstruck which is a really great movie in my opinion. I mean, she has bad luck and he fixes it with his wooden hand.

Oh my, 6 minutes past my bedtime.

Nighty night.

Killer Boots Man

2009-10-14T16:32:00.005-07:00

It's true!!!!!!

The fates were on my side this Columbus day as I shopped in honor of the man who shopped for a new world, and I found them.

Supple black leather. An oh so slight wedge heel. A buckle in the back for good measure and the perfect almond shaped toe.

Miracle!

A miracle indeed.

A miracle because it has been about 10 yrs since I found a knee high pair of boots that fit over my calves. And leather to boot (zing).

Not only do they fit over my muscular calves, but I can tuck my jeans into them. If this isn't the Columbus day miracle I've been praying for for years - then I don't know what is.

And so I'd like to thank Jessica Simpson for her string of unsuccessful and often publicly embarrassing relationships for helping her gain a little weight. A little weight that probably led her to tell the people who actually design her stuff to make a boot that would fit her new calves; and thus, mine.

I was SO happy after trying them on that I didn't yell at the lady with the shopping cart who ran over my real pair of shoes right in front of me. Serenity now. They were a bit pricey, but I don't care. I don't even feel bad....not one bit.

And the next day I was still thinking about them as I rode the train home. And as the train entered the Beacon Hill tunnel I was momentarily distracted when my brain switched to the song they play on Willy Wonka as they enter the tunnel. My train was slightly rocking and the train was picking up speed and the lights were flashing by...

Eat me out of house and home

2009-10-06T20:21:00.005-07:00

How does one person spend so much on food? I can't believe it, and I'm not even buying gushers. If I bought a lot less food then I could buy more clothes and they would fit better. Unbelievable.

Although I am not good at finances I am good at making awesome things. In fact, just the other day I was heard exclaiming "oh for cutes sakes!" after making some awesome throw pillows. And I also discovered that mature women who work at the fabric store scare me a little. They wear aprons and joke about seam widths, crazy yardage and reupholstering their whole house. I went to buy some fabric and the lady told me I didn't seem very sure about the 2 yards I asked for. And she was right. I was SO busted. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't really sew. Seriously. And I don't iron. I can't sew straight and I tend to hit the gas a little too much while stitching which contributes to the uneven lines. I just don't do it. But ever since my new couch came into my life I need to marry it to the complete opposite color scheme side chairs that were given to us. Not an easy task. So I made pillows.

Sew (ha ha) in short I buy too many grains in bulk and I feel uncomfortable in fabric stores.

Oh...also, I somehow managed to iron adhesive all over the ironing board.

....Man

Couch potato

2009-10-04T22:29:00.002-07:00

I start my first day of work tomorrow. I always get so anxious before my first day of work/school/meeting in-laws, etc. I just hate being the new person. Smiling and meeting people and figuring out which toilet stall you like best and where to eat your lunch. SO nerve wracking. At least they are taking me out to lunch, I like food. I can't talk about this anymore because it's making me more nervous.

WE GOT A COUCH!!!! Yeah, we did it. And it has a bed inside it just like I promised so everyone come and sleep on it. I LOVE house guests. Mi 1 bedroom apt es su 1 bedroom apt. And almost better than getting the couch was getting the box it came in. It is PERFECT! It gave me the best Halloween costume idea ever, seriously. You thought my Rosie the Riveter was good, you just wait. Ooooooooo, just wait. Rich wanted to throw the box out but I threatened and put my foot down. The box stays!

I get excited in general when it comes to big boxes. I still like to sit in them and hang-out. I remember walking past the back of the library at BYU one day and discovering a stash of HUGE refrigerator boxes left back there. Oh man, it was like Christmas! First I went home and grabbed a friend and then we straight back up to the boxes and we hid in the boxes and jumped out every once in a while scaring complete strangers. Beautiful. And then we took as many boxes as we could to Rock Canyon Park and tried sledding in the snow with them which was pretty unsuccessful - they act just like a plow, FYI.

I even considered putting all my blankets in the couch box and sleeping in it. But that would be a little much, right?

Almost there

2009-09-25T16:30:00.002-07:00

Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought "I'm a babe"? That didn't happen to me today. But I did think "Hey, I could almost be a babe today if I tried just a little bit harder this morning" when I stared at myself in the mirror. And then I left it at that. Maybe I felt like being an "almost babe" today. But I did decide to paint my nails while watching the new Melrose Place which is putting forth some effort on my part. And I think the extra effort on my part to paint those nails is what set in motion a lady name Linda to call and phone screen me for a job. She must have sensed I was ready to work.

And after she called it went a little like this:

Linda:"did you get a chance to check out our website and see what we do?".

Me:"I did actually. I'll be honest Linda, I'm not sure exactly what you do but it looks like you ...blah blah.".

Linda:"Not exactly......actually we....".

Me:"Ok, right.".

And right then and there I thought I had lost it. But she wants to meet me anyways on Monday. And between the 2 of us she told me my phone number on my resume was wrong so I checked it and it is actually correct. So I guess the two of us are meant to be. I don't exactly know what they do and she is a little number dyslexic. This I can handle.

Don't you hate it when you have a great pair of dark denim jeans and the color bleeds? I'm scared to wear them with anything remotely light colored. And my hands are slightly blue from rubbing my hands on my thighs. They look really...cold.

Alright everybody, let's have golden beets and lentils for dinner, c'mon!

Floor

2009-09-24T21:42:00.003-07:00

I used the oven 3 separate times today. Lunch: pizza. Dinner: minted oven roasted farmer's market carrots with curried apple couscous.

Dessert: chocolate chip zucchini cupcakes. And after about the second time I opened the oven door it finally kicked in that when I open the oven door I need to stand away for a second to avoid the wall of heat that comes charging out. Brutal. And I kept thinking "did I just kill a dolphin out there somewhere because I keep turning the oven off and on?". But the food was just so good that I didn't care. I do my part for the dolphins by buying dolphin safe tuna. I think that about covers it.

I was so excited to move into our place here that has bamboo flooring throughout. Finally! Chic and classy looking floors! No more industrial carpet! But then I lived in our house with wood floors for a couple of days. Not so glamorous anymore. They show everything. Dirt, dust, hair, it is all there on public display in little nests in the corners. I can't keep it clean. I CAN'T KEEP IT CLEAN!! Frustrating. And to be honest I miss the sound the vacuum makes when it sucks up dirt. It was so satisfying. And to top it off we have this after dinner ritual occasionally that has been ruined by our wood floors. When we stuff ourselves with something delicious we collapse on the floor to let our bellies rest and recover and the wood just isn't comfortable. That and I refuse to lay on it because of the aforementioned goods that congregate there. Exasperation! But I guess at least we can't get any carpet burns which is favorable.

Anyone have a miracle wood floor trapper of all things gross?

The best things in life are free

2009-09-22T22:25:00.003-07:00

I finally felt the burden of it tonight. The BIG it - money. I've never had much of it. But I've almost always had enough to do what I please without incurring debt. But those days are over. Now I truly window shop but mostly through the internet because that way I can't touch it and try it on and see how nice it feels on my skin. And oddly enough I'm ok with that. Our closet is so full already that I wouldn't want to impose the misery of being stuffed in somewhere to a new piece. I've mostly had a problem with food. I like to buy good food, it seems to be my vice lately. So I've committed to going to the store less and eating what we have which is still pretty good. Fine, I can do that.

But the true stab in the heart was tonight while I was talking to my madre on the phone. She asked about the couch we had been planning on getting. Yeah, we can't really swing that right now I told her. I felt like it had taken a tiger claw to my nose and my eyes began to swell. I don't know why I had such a strong reaction to the couch. We could go out and buy one with a little help from our money market but we aren't stupid. It isn't worth it right now. You know, living with a love seat and two chairs isn't soo bad. You just have to decide if watching a movie with your mate by your side is worth it. And if you curl up in a ball and leave either your feet or head hanging over the edge it is pretty comfy.

It's not the couch or the money really that bothers me - ok, yes it is. We live on a fixed income, like old people. Which I can't complain about because the Air-force pays for our living and we don't do anything, yet. But have you ever woken up in the morning and the pair of jeans you wore the day before is suddenly tighter and you don't know how it happened? Its only been 8 hours! Did I eat that much last night? Only you know you've really been eating that much for a while and it finally caught up to you. It's like that.

It's finally caught up to me. Blurg.

A love letter

2009-09-18T16:15:00.003-07:00

Dear Ricky,

It seems like my brain is swelling to capacity lately. I have so much to do and so little time and all without the help of a job. Are you in school right now? Are you looking at pictures of things oozing out of people right now? Are you typing on your computer thinking of me too?

I'm sitting at the kitchen table right now and staring out the window at the courtyard. The sun is shinning and casting a lovely golden glow on the trees and the sidewalk down below. It almost makes me forget about the building out back. I think we are getting some new neighbors. Either that or there is a man that keeps walking back and forth in front of our window with boxes and drawers for fun. Maybe he's just serious about exercise and likes to take the stairs a lot. Whatever the case I'm just glad the building is beginning to fill.

I think I'll make vegetarian chile tonight. Remember the last time we ate it? It was SO hot in Arizona but we cranked up the AC and enjoyed it anyways. It was so good we just kept smacking our lips and murmuring sounds of delight. We might not sweat as much this time around but I expect to hear contented sounds none the less.

The clock just turned 4:22pm. Only 38 more minutes until you get in your car and drive the 20 minutes home on Rainier Ave dodging the bus that blocks the right lane. Be careful when you come home, wear your seat-belt!

Can't wait to see you love, I made you peanut butter cookies with whole-wheat pastry flour for your heart.

Love mua

2 for 2

2009-09-16T22:00:00.003-07:00

Sometimes it's great when you go 2 for 2 in your season opener. The euphoria can bring fans and players alike together in a frenzy of good cheer. But our season opener didn't go that well. We went 2 for 2 for alright. 2 for 2 in the unlucky car hall of fame.

Exhibit A: Let's put aside the fact that Ricky's car groans and vibrates likes it's relaxing on a massage chair whenever you start it up and head straight to the first win. Yesterday while driving away from the airport after dropping off our darling daughter Stasy Ricky side-swiped a Subaru while changing lanes. 1-0.

Exhibit B: Now let's put aside the fact that my car is peeling apart like sunburned flesh and makes terrible metal on metal grinding noises whenever I accelerate and concentrate on our second victory. Today while spontaneously attending my favorite grocery store, Trader Joes, I locked the keys in my car with the radio running. Awesome. So I bought some groceries while I called Ricky over and over until he got out of class and answered. 40 minutes later and a picnic lunch in a parking garage consisting of pita chips, hummus and chocolate milk

I was let into my car by a nice kid in a UW hat. That makes a 2 for 2 sweep of the September car season! We are definitely in the lead and it looks like we might make it undefeated.

Also my cashier at TJ's told me I looked "very professional". To which I said thanks of course, then told him in no uncertain terms that I was NOT in professional clothing. I was wearing a t-shirt, sweater and jeans. Where is he from?

And to top it all off the joke that I tell everyone about why i bought a reusable shopping bag came true. I kept telling everyone that I had to buy one because I didn't want anyone to punch me for using regular bags like regular people. And on my way back to my radio emitting car I was in the elevator with an old man and his reusable TJ's grocery back and he looked at my regular paper bags and made an audible sigh and said "no reusable bags, huh?". "No. I didn't know I was coming here" stupid old man who drove off in his bio-diesel VW.

And now Rich is going over our expenditures...

Desperately seeking paycheck, Laquina

2009-09-15T21:42:00.003-07:00

Where do I begin?

After a great long weekend with the bf Stasy I wanted nothing more than to sit and stare at my computer looking at sample sales and perusing cooking sites whilst checking my email. And while I was romancing all this technology I was sampling and sampling all the various flavors of salt water taffy we picked up on the waterfront today. Mmmmm...pumpkin, banana, eggnog, rootbeer.

And then my email delivered this: blah, blah, blah "At this time, we are moving forward with other candidates who are a closer match with the skills and requirements of the position. " blah blah blah, you suck.

And then I read it word for word to Ricky and then shrugged my shoulders. He said I seemed "pretty happy" in his words and this confused him. "What do you want me to do?" I questioned. " There isn't anything I can really do about it" I finished. Should I cry? Wail and nash my teeth and pound the floor? They didn't want me and because of that I didn't want them.

And by the time I realized it the coffee table looked like this:

The picture is dark because I was too lazy to turn another light on even though I got up to grab my phone to take the picture. Do you think the interviewer figured that out about me and that is why I didn't get the job?

My computer keeps beeping at me now with all the emails Ricky is flooding me with for potential jobs. Doesn't he look dreamy when he job hunts for me?

Hillshire Farms, go meat! - NOT

2009-09-11T13:52:00.003-07:00

We were eating dinner (quinoa, go figure) the other night and talking about getting each other surprises. I like to come home and surprise Ricky sometimes with little things I picked up here or there that I think he would like. Case in point: last week I came home from the Great Wall Market with a mango bubble tea for my man. He LOVES bubble tea and he gulped/chewed it down faster than you can say Epiglottal failure. And he likes to surprise me with things that I've picked out. It works for us.

And after our delicious and nutritious meal of quinoa inspired by this recipe from 101cookbooks he surprised me and made my life by uttering this simple phrase, "I never want to eat meat again!". No finer words were ever heard by my ears. "ah!" I gasped. "See? Now you have given me the best surprise ever and I didn't even pick it out!".

I'm not against eating meat, eat it to your hearts content. I'm not even a vegetarian, although I was for a couple of years in high school. I just don't really like meat. I don't like the taste or the texture or the idea. I don't believe that you really need it and you can have a balanced and healthy diet without it. In fact, the only type of meat I actually really like is ground beef and ground turkey. Other than that, thanks but no thanks.

Ricky still likes meat and he will eat it other places - like last night at the Italian place around the corner we had italian sausage on our slices and it was delectable. But I have made such delicious food with grains and veggies that we have no need for it in our house.

Sometimes the simplest things are the best. Come over, I'll prove it.

Yes, this is she

2009-09-09T13:37:00.002-07:00

Have you ever just felt like crying because you were so overwhelmed with pressure, stress, nervousness, anger, anything? Sometimes I just get so full of.....of... everything that the only thing that I can manage are some watery eyes. And my throat is soo dry. I just can't get enough liquid to satiate my aching throat. Why is there an abundance of water in my eyes and none in my mouth where it is supposed to be.

I just had a phone interview which is almost worse than meeting with someone in person. You have to impress them with your voice and how sing-songy you can make yourself sound while you try to act casually about how you are a good a something you've never actually done. And I have this problem with becoming monotone when I'm nervous. And I was just so thirsty. I had a water bottle next to me that I kept taking silent gulps from to help ward off the monotone-ness and scratchy throat sounds. I made her laugh a couple of times. That's good, right? Right?

And all I can think about is Quinoa and how I want to eat it and eat it all day and everyday. I just have such a mind for quinoa right now. I want those lovely curlicues to pop in my mouth and fill me with completeness. Good thing the farmers market is today or I might go insane. I'm going to buy beets today. I already decided. I'm intimidated by fresh beets. My only previous experience with beets is fighting with my family over wether to eat pickled or non-pickled beets from the can. Non-pickled beets all the way. Did you know that blue cheese is a natural accompaniment to beets? They say their flavors just meld together beautifully.

Besides dreaming of quinoa and beets (although not together...yet) I guess I just have my head in the clouds. And truth be told sometimes I just like having my head high above my body. There is all this pressure from myself and various other individuals to get on the ball and be something. I'm trying. Truly, I am.

There are a couple movies I like to watch when wanting to escape and today feels like a

Broken English kind of day. Wish me luck with the beets.

Feliz Cumpleaños

2009-09-08T14:59:00.002-07:00

Oh...I had SUCH a craving for chocolate chip cookies today. So I made them and of course they were delicious. So when I called my Abuela today to wish her a happy 96th birthday I told her that I made them for her and I was eating them in her honor. And in true Abuela style she turned the conversation around on me and blessed me that I would enjoy the cookies and to hug my husband for her. What just happened? I was trying to send good wishes her way but she ended up overpowering me with her wishes. Man, she is good

I was going to post something all about me, me, me but I changed my mind and decided to write a little story or two about my Abuela in her honor because hello, she is 96.

Her long-term memory is sharp as a tack. She can remember down to the exact day when certain events happened. I have heard hundreds of stories about her working in the fields, digging for clams in the river by her house, taking lunch to her family in a basket on her head miles away and being wanted by all the boys because in her words "I wasn't the prettiest, but I was hard-working and respectable", which I guess was on all the boys lists in pre-war Spain. Also, once she balled her hand into a fist there was no way you could undo her fingers...NO way. Most of those stories I have heard on repeat for the past 10 years. In fact, I remember one summer when we were together that every time we rounded a specific corner of the road I was treated to the same story over and over and over and.....over. I could silently repeat it from the back seat by heart.

But her short-term memory is a little behind and sometimes she forgets where she puts things and gets a little frustrated when she can't find them. Case in point; My parents were out of town one weekend years ago and she had made a couple of loaves of bread. Well, she was missing one loaf and couldn't find it anywhere. So naturally who would she blame? Me, I was the only other person in the house. She was convinced that I had stolen a loaf of bread from her. I mean she could NOT be dissuaded from thinking that I stole a loaf from her. I reasoned and reasoned with her. Why would I steal a loaf instead of just taking a slice? Where would I hide said stolen loaf? Well, if I hadn't stolen it for me then I had stolen it and given it to one of my friends. I wasn't really in the habit of gifting loaves of bread to my friends at that time or ever really but she didn't believe it. It could only be one of two things for her: Either I stole it for me or I stole it for a friend. She was mad at me for hours until finally I went a looking for it. I opened the oven and it was still in there. She had forgotten it in the oven. Simple mistake I guess, just why all the stealing stuff? I just have to remember that when she was growing up in Spain and going through the Spanish civil war that someone just might have stolen a loaf of bread or something even worse. So I brought her the loaf and showed her where it was and then we called it even.

I laugh about it now but I think I was pretty offended at the time that she thought I would steal from her. I reminded her of the story last time I was with her but she didn't remember any of it. So we laughed and laughed about it together over our lunch at the Chinese Buffet she loves so much. She is a great lady.

Her hearing is getting worse but she never ceases to amaze me. Be it being baptized at 92 or always changing who gets what of her jewelry based on our performances that month to lovingly breaking up her dogs hard food with a hammer everyday to hemming all my pants for me.

Te quiero Abuela.

Mine

2009-09-04T12:15:00.003-07:00

I was eating the most delicious gala apple from my farmers market the other night and Ricky made a motion that he wanted a bite. I pondered not sharing it for a minute but then realized I was pretty much obligated to give him a bite because I eat his food all the time. "OK, just don't be juicy and just take a little bite" I pleaded. I HATE sharing apples. In fact, in the past when someone asks for a nibble of my crispy apple I politely or un-politely as it happens refuse them. In my opinion sharing apples is the grossest thing you can share with your mouths, besides herpes but that goes without saying. I would rather share my soda with someone a million times over than my apple. There is just so much saliva and biting and sucking and noises involved. There are wayward tongues, juice dribbles and double-bites. I can't do it. I JUST CAN'T DO IT!! So don't ask me for a bite of my apple.

I cleaned the bathroom today. I don't know what came over me, it is only Friday. I clean on Saturdays. It may have been the soft light coming through the frosted window in the bathroom or maybe I just feel so accomplished already today that I wanted to add to it.

And now off to meet Ricky for our first Sushi in Seattle post move. Arigato.

Yipee!

2009-09-01T21:56:00.003-07:00

GOOD NEWS!!! Our friends Mike and Whitney are coming to Seattle to visit AND my bf Stasy!!! I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. And sadly we do not have our sofa sleeper couch yet because of the Swine flu. Who knew the flu could stop furniture manufacturing?

And to keep the good news going I've decided to do something with my life AND I actually have a plan. But I'm not telling you because a watched pot never boils.

Ricky and I were driving home tonight and he asked me which turn was our street because it's really hard to see it and I told him to just look for all the people. And then we laughed about how we would describe which street to turn on to someone coming over, "Just look for all the loiterers and then turn right". It might seriously work. Our guests will soon find this out for themselves. Muah-ha-ha.

And just look at this beauty I got at the Salvation Army for $5.

Things are lookin up for 'ole Laquina.

You go up there and get me a toddler

2009-08-29T17:28:00.002-07:00

Am I missing something? Am I supposed to have children already? I was perusing through facebook last night and it seems that 90% of the girls I know from high school are all at LEAST on their second kid. Well, except the ones that aren't married and frankly, I applaud them for not having kids yet (two feet on the floor ladies).

I just don't feel it, you know? Not one part of me wants to have kids right now. Not. One. Part. I love other peoples kids but I have no desire to birth one of my own.

In fact, Ricky and I had a conversation about just this topic the other night. I can't remember what he said for the millioneth time that led me to reply exasperatedly "you are SO baby hungry". To which he replied something else and I finished with "well go eat somebody's else's baby, we aren't having any yet".

For now I'll leave the baby making to the expert:

Shh...you'll wake the neighbors

2009-08-26T23:22:00.002-07:00

I know I said I'd post pictures of the new place but maybe I don't want to. I'm still wrestling with the fact that I live in... the hood. And learning how to use my "outside voice" all the time like my neighbors is tiring. But not as tiring as spying through my blinds and watching all the "activity" on the street below. I feel like I'm living out the real life version of Spike Lee's "Do the right thing" movie except that I've only seen clips of it on VH1's I love the 80's.

If I wanted to watch a movie with positive moral values then I would just pop in "Superstar". But switching my judgement over to dairy products, I accidentally bought whole milk at the store yesterday. It was the best accident I've had all year (except for getting married). I had some for breakfast with my cereal this morning not knowing it was whole milk and I just kept thinking to myself "man, this milk is sooo creamy. I've got to get this brand again". It wasn't until I went for cereal/milk round 2 tonight that I read the label. "Ah-ha, this makes more sense" I told myself.

*I should have been...

And opera singer. I can really belt it out and I appreciate the merits of the song "Ave maria". With a little training I think I could have filled lesser known opera houses or starred in off-broadway productions.

Today is a good day!

2009-08-19T07:59:00.003-07:00

I couldn't sleep anymore this morning partly because I had an awesome dream about seeing Gwen Stefani in her garage (she looked AWESOME) and mostly because we are moving in our place today!!!!! And so far, I love it. Bamboo floors? Yes please! So last night in celebration of the move we went and picked blackberries from the bushes that grow wild all over the island we are staying on

And made homemade blackberry ice cream. Mmmmm delicious! I can't wait to clean it up and bring all our stuff in and then buy a couch. That's right, no more lounging on just a love seat. I'll post pics after I take them and we get the internet.

Hooray!

They actually let me in

2009-07-01T12:27:00.002-07:00

I'm blogging from my airport shuttle on the way to downtown Toronto. How cool is that? Free wi-fi on the bus!

Happy Canada Day everyone! Gotta go because I'm starting to get a little car sick.

Let's fly away

2009-06-30T21:30:00.001-07:00

Well...I'm headed to Toronto tomorrow for 6 days! See you later suckers.

My thoughts in 3 parts

2009-06-28T20:25:00.003-07:00

Part 1:

I've had to completely retrain my brain when I go to my closet to get dressed. I'm so used to carting a jacket or a light sweater out with me when I go out at night that I literally have to stop and think and remind myself that it is still 97 degrees when I step out the door at 8pm. It is the weirdest feeling to be out at night and still suffocating in the thick heat. I can't get used to it and I don't want to get used to it. I can't wait to get out of this hair dryer in the face place.

Part 2:

I think I want to start a series on my blog entitled "I should have been..." detailing the many occupations that I think I could have been good at if I only applied myself. Make sure you look out for those at the end of each post.

Part 3:

I discovered something last night that might have just changed my whole food world forever: green bananas. Last night we were celebrating our 6th month anniversary (already feels like forever) and went to a Jamaican place in downtown Phoenix called The bread fruit that was absolutely delicious. That's were I had green banana for the first time.

It came on the side of my plate next to the wheat dumpling and chicken curry with a side of vegetables steamed over coconut milk (heavenly by the way). It looked like a grey cooked banana, interesting. But you mash it up and eat it like potatoes. It was just like a baked potato, only better! I couldn't believe this whole other use for the banana was under my nose all my life and I didn't know it. I barraged our server with questions about how the cook it, etc and then went home and did a little more research. You just use a regular supermarket banana, not a plantain, and boil it in water for about 20 min, take the skin off and mash it up. It has a very mild flavor and can be used for all sorts of things! In fact, I read a recipe for banana fries. Just peel the green banana, cut into small slices and fry in the oil of your choice, then salt for a healthy alternative to french fries. They recommend smaller bananas for this. Kids and most adults will never know the difference! Also, Ricky did a little looking too and apparently green bananas help you absorb calcium which is good because I don't think any of us ladies wants to take Sally Field up on her offer to find out more about osteoporosis meds. I don't know about you but potato who? I'm over the spud now.

Don't bug me

2009-06-15T23:05:00.003-07:00

I was reminded of a funny story tonight while I was battling with a bunch of cauliflower in the sink. I am SUPER paranoid about bugs in my produce so I rinse EVERY corner of every piece of lettuce, etc. And tonight while I bathed the cauliflowers every bunch I was taken back to a night in college during my junior year when just a situation had given me the upmost pleasure that one could ever get at the expense of another person.

Her name was Suzy. She had lived in the "loft" of the big barn on 7th E and 620 N for who knows how many years. All I know is she thought she owned that place. And I get it Suzy, you were my age now and 4 young phillies in their junior year invaded your space. But I don't think you needed to go all passive aggressive on us and take down any and ALL decorations we had put up and leave them in a pile on the floor to be discovered when we returned home. It's called communication and we had to start it with an 'apartment meeting' after your episode. C'mon, and "apartment meeting"? You made us do it. Didn't really help.

And after months of icy glares and barely a word shared between the 5 of us it happened. You were sitting in the kitchen having just devoured one of your spectacular vegetarian fares, just a big pile of broccoli, and I came in to make my meal and noticed a big wet spot on the counter. Ahh...you had washed your broccoli and forgotten to wipe up the excess water. But it didn't look just like water. It looked...occupied. So I scooped in for a better look and AH-HA!!!!! It was full of bugs! Little black bugs everywhere. There is no way they all made it out of that pile of broccoli - she had eaten bugs!!! So I casually said, "hey Suzy, you might want to come take a look at this". She did. The look on her face was priceless. I think she wanted to toss her vegetables if you catch my drift. It made all the awkward silences worth it.

She had eaten bugs.

And tonight as I remembered this while I washed my vegetables it made me smile just as big as it did the day Suzy ate bugs.

To Denver with love

2009-06-13T10:43:00.006-07:00

Ricky and I have a problem deciding on where to live one day. We pretty much differ in all our wants for an eventual home. He loves rain and boat shoes and I have curly hair that frizzes in the rain and ankles that aren't built for boat shoes. He loves the east coast and all the green and pretentiousness, I love the west coast and all the sunshine and laid-backness. Basically we can't decide on anywhere because there is nowhere that I love. He would love plenty of places but I just don't feel attached to anywhere yet. And then I went to Denver.

Look, I'm not saying that Denver is perfect but have you smelled the air there yet? Delicious. It smells like mountains and it is crisp and tangible and intoxicating. Everywhere you look is green and there are white-tailed bunnies hopping everywhere amidst the prairie dog hills with cute prairie dogs perched outside their holes just looking all cute with their hands held close to their chests. I know if I lived there I would probably curse the prairie dogs for tearing up my yard but right now from far away they are so adorable.

Also, they have a great light rail into the city which is actually why I liked Denver so much. The suburbs were just suburbs but I LOVED the down town. You end up at the station right next to the smallest six flags I've ever seen perfectly situated in walking distance to the baseball stadium.

Then you walk right into down town on a street where they don't allow cars and you can just wander around and eat great food and and relax amongst the buildings. I saw a side street full of christmas lights so we wandered down and came upon a whole street closed off full of chalk drawings and found this:

It is a Lechtenstein just for Ricky since that is one thing we agree on, we love the Lichtenstein. I just loved it. I'm not saying it is perfect and more than likely we won't end up there because I just hate snow and I know it snows there but it was so nice. Also, the children there were very unremarkable. None of my co-workers could come up with a better word than that for them. They were just...blah. But other than that - Bravo Denver, you made me want to come back again and again. And even though the airport was a little nuts

how can you be mad at something that looks like it is covered in merengue?

Maybe "the mile high city" needs a new slogan: "Just a mile below heaven".

Would you like them in your closet? Would you like them on your faucet?

2009-06-02T10:48:00.003-07:00

"Oh no!" I said as I slapped myself on the forehead this morning. "No, NO! NOT AGAIN!" I screeched frantically. "No, no, NO!!!!!" I howled again and again as I rifled through my entire closet - and my husbands too. "Where are they?" I wondered aloud.

"Ughhhhhhhhhhhh, ughhhhhhhhhhh" I slowly stammered to myself. "I've done it again" I said to myself out loud. "Apparently I just have soo many clothes that I just throw things away without even wearing them once" I scolded.

What is wrong with me? This is the second time I've thrown away a new article of clothing that I love...into the garbage. It is SO unbelievable that it has to be believable.

The first time was in Tyson's Corner, Virginia 2 summers ago. I had just scored the most unbelievable dress at my favorite store Zara for $20 on clearance. Picture this: black, knee-length frock with embroidered bright flowers just like a Mexican dress except from mid-chest up and onto the shoulders was covered in black sequins. A sequined Mexican dress! Is there anything more perfect? And I was rushing to the airport but stopped to get my hair extensions (it was a nice experiment until I got dread locks underneath, nasty) fixed and in a rush to throw out garbage and extra bags from my friends car I threw away the bag containing my new dress. Not only did I throw it away but it was a garbage in front of a Panera eatery. No offense, they have some decent grub but it was no place to lay to rest the mother of all cocktail dresses.. I didn't realize it until I was already miles high in the sky. I just hope that someone, somewhere emptying the garbage found it and wore it like I never could.

And today, more of the same. I think I blogged a bit ago about finding the perfect pair of white pants - which never happens, btw. It is like getting a new haircut and being able to perfectly recreate it the first time you have to do it by yourself: impossible. But I found them and I was excited to wear them but as is the usual with all pants I buy they needed to be hemmed. So I put them aside to await the sewing machine. And today as I picked my wardrobe for my trip to Denver and Utah I went to find them and bam! Not there. Not anywhere. I searched high and low and really low (under the bed) but again, nothing. Then I remembered the pile of shopping bags I had outside my closet and how I wanted to be proactive and take out all the garbage - ok, and how I added more shopping bags to the pile and didn't want Ricky to notice - and they must of been in there, still in their bag.

Another wasted piece of perfect clothing. Sure, the wide leg khakis I had to buy two summers ago for my summer camp keep showing up in my closet, but the good pants go to an early grave. Maybe I should hire a garbage sifter to catch such things. I would just feel bad because 99% of our refuse involves bits of food. Yuck.

My name is Laquina and I throw away brand new clothes. Help.

MAY-DAY! MAY-DAY!

2009-05-28T16:10:00.004-07:00

Probably one of the worst things that could happen to me happened today. About 5 min. ago. I came home with a load of groceries and as I approached my door I saw a small dark lump in front of my door. And as is customary for me here in Arizona I crept a little closer to inspect what kind of creature it could be. And of course, what was it? A GIANT MOTH. It was was sitting there perched in front of my door like a guard dog for hire. I had no idea what to do. I had all these groceries and it was soo hot outside and I couldn't get in my house. I put my groceries down and just stared at it for about 5 min. willing it to want to leave. I didn't have anything good to throw at it really so first I chucked my empty horchata cup at it and barely missed and nothing. So I looked for the next best thing and all I had were my receipts. I crumpled one up and it landed right next to it and still nothing. I tried my last receipt and it too had no effect. I literally had nothing decent left to throw at it except a watermelon, yogurt or some eggs and those aren't things you ideally want to hurl at cement.

All I had left besides my gorgeous blue leather purse which I was not going to sacrifice, people please!, was my new Instyle. I remember looking at it at the grocery check stand and I thought no, I shouldn't. But inspiration told me to do it and boy was inspiration right - that magazine saved my and my perishables life. I hurled it and splat! It landed right on top and I shuffled all the groceries in the house safely and successfully. Only, what now? I had my brand new magazine brimming full of beautiful things and it was the gatekeeper for the newly obliterated intruder. So I got my broom and tried to flip it over from a distance. After shuffling a bit around the hallway outside my door I finally succeeded in getting it flip and as it did little moth body parts began to fall everywhere. It's not my fault, it had its chance to live. And then I had no choice but to rip off the back cover and throw it away, RIP Gucci ad.

I know this all sound highly unrational but it's my cross to bear. As I wrote this I was getting sickening waves of painful goose-bumps cascading up and down my arms and legs. I think I need a break from all the excitement this afternoon.

The emperor's new clothes

2009-05-27T11:01:00.004-07:00

It is too hot to do anything. It is too hot to wear anything, eat anything, or clean anything. Sometimes I just lay on my bed under the whirring ceiling fan and do a mental checklist of my closet offerings. Denim, merino wool, tweed, hounds-tooth, acrylic, cotton-poly blend. No, no, no! I can't bear to put any of them on. My wardrobe is the result of living pretty much my entire life in Utah where there are four seasons and although the summers may get hot they are child's play compared to the Arizona melt-down starting to occur now.

Most days the only thing I can bear to wear is one of my Mexican dresses. They are the most comfortable and cool and all the colors are an instant shot of valium for the eyes. I just...love them. The only problem is that sometimes I'm surrounded by large groups of Mexicans. Don't get twisted, I LOVE the Mexicans. I love the culture, the food and hello, have you seen a Telenovela yet?

For all you gringos they are translated as follows from top to bottom: "Fire in the blood", "Sins of others", "When you're mine", and finally "Don Juan and his beautiful dame".

Young and the what? They totally trump our soaps. But back to the Mexican dress. It's not like anyone else is wearing them - and I mean ANY one else. I'm the lone wolf sporting my cotton hand-embroidered frock. And it just so happens that the last time I was wearing my dress I found myself in just the predicament I mentioned above: surrounded by crowds of Mexican people. I can't remember why but we took an impromptu trip to one of my favorite places ever: The Ranch Market on Southern and Stapley. It is this HUGE Mexican grocery store/eatery. They had a really famous one in Phoenix for years and they just opened this one 5 min. from us. It is pure heaven once you enter the doors that say Bienvenidos (welcome).

So there we were in the parking lot about to enter and I looked down. "Oh no, I'm wearing my dress" I said to Ricky. There wasn't much I could about it at that point so I sucked it up and went in anyway. But for those who are a little confused it would be kind of like you entering a grocery store in Germany wearing lederhosen and ordering a bratwurst and a beer. Silly. They don't wear lederhosen and Mexicans don't wear those dresses. Oh well, I guess I just showed exactly how much I like them. Although I felt a little sheepish I went about my business eating my huaraches, drinking my agua fresca and ordering queso fresco from the deli.

Now I'm just trying to get other clothes into the rotation, as much as I hate it, to avoid this happening again. Man I love that dress.

*editors note: If you haven't tried queso fresco you really should. It is mild and soft almost like cottage cheese pressed into a mold. It is slightly salty and totally refreshing, and compared to most others cheeses it is really good for you. Trust me, you are going to love it.

Badges? We don't need no stinking badges.

2009-05-20T23:25:00.003-07:00

I have been thinking A LOT lately about what to do with my life. Do I go back to school, and if so, for what? Do I get a Master's degree in something I kind of like, become a dental hygienist or certify to be the teacher everyone wants me to be that I don't want to be. And as I was talking to Ricky about it tonight I remembered a little something my oldest sister at the Jet set gave me a couple of years back:

I think she was on to something. I think it was part joke, part what I think about my style of life and a big part true. I repeat, I think she was on to something. Sure, to some people I have lived a crazy life traveling every couple of years and hardly studying just to get through college, but to other people who have fancy degrees and bajillions more frequent flier miles than me I am just a regular person. Voila! Mediocre!

I don't want to be mediocre anymore! But I'm stuck between getting into school loan debt, my ticking uterus clock and taking the GRE (that alone makes me ill). And as I searched for the Mediocrity poster to share with you all I found this:

Something to look forward to as I begin this journey. I relate to this one quite well right now. Does your job or lack thereof define you? I need an answer.

Let's eat!

2009-05-15T00:02:00.004-07:00

I did something I never do: I clicked on a link advertised above my gmail inbox because it said vegetarian chili and hey, I love a good vegetarian chili. It sounded so good at the moment and it was the best thing I ever did. I came upon the most delicious website of some nice lady named Heidi. It has the MOST delicious things posted. I just sat there clicking on recipe after recipe and drooling. I started taking a mental note of everything in my kitchen and started an actual list of ingredients to go out and buy immediately tomorrow. The recipes are all mostly vegetarian but don't worry all you tofu haters you can leave out the tofu (which is only in some recipes) and add in whatever you want but they are just good, healthy, fresh meals for anyone. I'll take mine with tofu please. Just look at the chili:

Mmmmm....I want it even though I hesitate to make it in the pleasant 102 degree weather here. Also, the nice thing is the ingredients aren't too crazy so you get them wherever you are. You can get the recipe here and start searching through the site and let's get cooking!!! Cousin E - I thought of you this whole post, enjoy! Bon appetit.

*update: Check out these cookies - no butter, no flour, no egg, no sugar, no way!! Yummmm

Oh my "H"

2009-05-10T22:25:00.003-07:00

"Mother....lover". "Son of a .....bisquit". Stupid piece of.....shi". "Unbe....freakingleivable". And my favorite, "how the haetch is this happening to me"?

All are things either being mumbled or screamed in my apartment tonight.

My stupid mother - loving sewing machine is a piece of shat that I can't take anymore.

Now to those who harp with the utmost virtue that substituting swear words is still bad or even worse, to those who think you just sound stupid when you substitute like-sounding words for the real ones: FU. I would so much rather yell "you MOTHER LOVING PIECE OF PISS" while around others then use the real deal. It is just not very lady like and to be honest I'd rather save up me swears for a truly deserving bar brawl - should it ever come along.

I just don't know what else to say. I'm not a sewer, I don't particularly gain any real glee from throwing something together other than the wind sock I made in Junior high because that thing truly danced in the wind. But I decided that since I no longer have a grandma to exploit I have to do the darning and mending myself. I pulled out the sewing machine my mom gifted me 2 years ago and I just can't do anything right. It is dirty inside and making all the thread gray and greasy so I opened it and took it apart and cleaned it. Verdict: thread still dirty. It was sewing all fine and dandy and dirty until I decided to sew an actual garment and the bottom thread keeps getting clogged. Verdict: immovable needle due to thread tangle below. I cleaned out the bottom thread and reset the two threads. Verdict: thread clogged again.

I'm at my wits end. I know a lot of this is human error on my part but c'mon. I gave up and walked away tonight and left everything where it was.

And now I'm afraid to open my mouth because the only thing ready and willing to come out is fake swear words. Humiliation.

Thus I have tried blog therapy and I'm hoping this will work or I may never sew again. At the very least, not around children. I just can't clean up this fake potty mouth.

Anti-dentite

2009-05-07T22:39:00.005-07:00

I'm so mad at my Dentist (may he R.I.P.), but not really. I love my dentist. Sometimes I feel like the deranged girlfriend of my dentist and I hate it. In my head I still picture us together on center st. in Orem just looking out the window and rinsing with fluoride just like he taught me. I miss the small talk we used to have throughout the years about what year in school I was and we both couldn't believe how big I was getting. I was there through the boring years when you just had to stare at the ceiling and rejoiced for my dentist when he had televisions installed in each cube and you could watch pictures of people's before and after smiles. Sure, we had our ugly moments involving cavities and lectures on flossing more, but he always left me with a goodie bag to let me know he cared.

Then one day I fell off the insurance wagon and suddenly he wanted to charge me money to let me see him. Money to let me see him! We had been together for soo long. Didn't he care if I got gingivitis suddenly? Or what about a root canal? Would he only care if I payed him everything in my savings bank? I wanted to counter with "but we have your daughters wedding announcement on our refrigerator!!! How many patients can you say that about? Huh? Huh?!". But I couldn't do it. I was forced to wait behind a desk and communicate second hand through the receptionist.

And the worst part was that I could still see a peek of the world I had been tossed out of without so much of a glance. There they were, all the blessed patients happily being buffed and flossed in their cubicles of light never knowing that I had ever been there. We used to be a family my dentist and I. We never had doors and he kept all the pictures we ever took together. I couldn't bear it any longer so I skipped town...permanently.

And today I was reminded of the insurance restraining order I had back in Utah as I waited 2 1/2 hours to see a Dental student at the free clinic at Ricky's school. Oh the fall from grace. The indignity! I used to get right in. They expected me. This time I had to wait until I was finally admitted and then they took my blood pressure and weighed me and finally poked my sensitive tooth with an ice pick to make sure it was still alive. It was and it... hurt. It hurt almost as bad as missing my dentist. But it is I who will have the last laugh when I show up next month on center st. in Orem and demand that he fix me up for free - or at the very least for very, very cheap because this whole mess was his fault.

I guess he figured if he couldn't clean my teeth then no one else could, so he messed up on purpose just to see me again.

Oh Mr. Dentist...you shouldn't have (giggle).

Summer love

2009-05-04T13:15:00.003-07:00

I'm currently obsessed with bathing suits. Ever since I discovered the a one piece can be flattering that is all I want to wear. I have spent so many years feeling kind of comfortable in my bathing suits and now I feel like I have a new lease on life! It sounds so silly but now I want to be in my swim suit all the time. And thanks once again to my trusty TJ Maxx I have recently acquired a new piece to add to the line up. Finally I can look the part of the pin-up girls I have always wanted to be:

It's the glamorous, the flossy, flossy. I'm still having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that my dearly beloved tankinis will probably be laid to rest this summer and maybe every summer thereafter. But they've had their day in the sun...pun intended. I've done a complete 180 from the low rise jeans and tank tops of my first youth and now during my second youth I am purposely shopping at stores I NEVER would have gone in because they were "mom stores". In fact, I went into New York and Co. the other day for the first time and walked out with the best fitting pair of white pants I have ever tried on. No kidding! White pants!! I feel completely changed and electrified and it seems my future is so bright I've gotta wear shades (big Armani ones with gold sides).

Bird flu

2009-05-01T18:33:00.003-07:00

I don't get it. If you wouldn't put it on your shirt, why would you put it somewhere else?

And if you would wear it on your shirt then I know where you can get it.

Yo voutre un nap

2009-04-19T21:40:00.005-07:00

I think I need to call my mom and ask her if she used to put me on the washing machine to get me to fall asleep. I have problems falling asleep in my own bed but I cannot resist the lull of the airplane. Just like a cobra being seduced by the haunting notes of the flute I too am seduced by the oxygen being pumped in and all the white noise. I absolutely cannot stay awake. I literally mean I cannot stay awake.

BTW, does anyone think the pillow in this picture is ridiculous? That is a ginormous pillow to carry-on. Just wear a shirt that says "hey, I'm really old and only concerned about comfort at the expense of looking like a du-fuss".

It has just gotten worse over the years. I used to sleep a little here and there and it has gradually slipped into falling asleep before the plane even leaves it's dock. I have woken up before and been confused that we were already cruising high above the clouds because I don't remember taking off. And today we flew from Chicago to Phoenix and I fell asleep right on schedule before the take-off and besides a few position changes I woke up to the captain telling us we were beginning our final descent into Phoenix. I could not believe I slept the whole time. I slept about 3 hours on the plane without even knowing.

What is to become of me? If my rate of falling asleep continues to rise and the trips don't get any longer then the numbers say I am in trouble. Will I fall asleep now before I even buckle my seat belt? Will I drool on the business man next to me? What if I sleep walk on the plane? Someone could rob me so easily. I mean, I was sleeping on Ricky's shoulder while he was furiously playing DDR on his phone and I didn't know it. In my own bed if so much as his toe wanders over I wake up and yell until he moves it.

I think I must have aviation narcolepsy. And I'm sure there are a number of other people in German parliament who suffer from this as well. Am I alone here?

Editors note: Be aware that when I googled "sleeping on a plane" in the images there were TONS of pictures that people had taken of random strangers sleeping on the plane. We could ALL be out there somewhere with our mouths open.....

Take this job and shove-it

2009-03-30T20:09:00.003-07:00

I forgot what working is like. After I moved here and didn't have a job I thought "how am I ever going to fill up all of this time? I'm SO bored". Well, I filled it up. I just filled up all my time with lots of stuff and now that I'm strapped for time again I don't like it. Not one bit.

I see the value in hard work and I fully intend to teach my children all about it as they weed the garden at 7am every sat morning. I just don't know how much value it has for me anymore. I've worked long hours as a waitress, called people to survey them, folded and re-folded clothes in retail, filed and ran excel sheets, wrangled other people's kids and stamped and stamped books in the back of the library. I've had a wide variety of jobs but maybe I've peeked. Who says you have to wait until your 50's to top-out?

I was sooo good at keeping up the house and making sure the kitchen was fully stocked. I mean, I was REALLY good at it. Service with a smile I like to say. And I penciled in time for a bike ride and some quality time at the pool occasionally. It most certainly is a crime to keep me away from what I excel at, right?

You know they say that we never use our full brain capacity and that is probably true...for people who work. You get focused on and really good at only a couple of things like payroll and time cards or mergers and acquisitions. But when I wasn't working I think I was operating at 98% brain capacity. I was reading all sorts of interesting books - some of them science related - and listening to NPR and watching videos of string theory and extraordinary people with super-human brains. I cooked new food all the time and started sewing and watched 4 seasons of Friends.

Tell me I'm not a better, stronger, faster human after that. Now I sit down 8 hrs a day staring at a computer and all the super awesome knowledge I had obtained the past couple of months is draining.

"I don't wanna work, I just wanna bang on this mug all day..."