I hear there are fires in California right now. I hear lot's of people have had to leave their homes and go elsewhere.
I know they are probably not close to you but can you smell the fire? Does it make all your clothes smell like you've been camping? Do you find yourself constantly wanting hotdogs and grilled onions? Whenever you go outside do you have to do the human rotisserie move where you rotate your body to keep warm while one side stays frigid - except you are the reverse and you try and keep one side cool while the other one threatens to singe?
Is all the smoke headed to Calabasas because smoke follows beauty? Have you done an FHE yet where everyone competes to see who can get closest to the fire? Are you blaming it all on the Governator? Or how about BP?
I'm worried about you. Mostly because I hear that flame retardant kills birds too. Do you see any dead birds?
Also, I'm very curious what 5 things you would grab on your way out the door if you had to evacuate.
Let me know how you are.
Love me
1 comment:
When are there NOT fires in southern california? The trade-off for perfect weather and pretty humans are occasional earthquakes, Santa Ana winds, and fires.
No to all questions about smelling it, or smelling like it.
It's a little known fact, but the smoke is headed to Calabasas not because of the pretties, but because there are lots of Jews that live there. And smoke follows RICH beauty.
Yes to FHE competitions. We also bring tri-tip and s'more stuff for cookouts near the fire-line, which we usually share with the firemen and thus squeeze some service in there too.
Of course we blame the Governator, and rightly so. He banned that flame retardant because it was indeed killing all the little birdies. So now the fires just roast people alive instead, since we can't really put them out without the fire "bird killing" retardant. We don't balme BP though, because that's just silly.
If my house were on fire, I would grab the following 5 without hesitation: My new incredibly sexy black Calvin Klein dress (which I got half off at TJ Maxx), my leopard print pumps (because they look great with the dress), a bottle of Excedrin Migraine (smoke gives me a headache), Arrested Development dvds (since I'll probably have some free time now that my house is gone), and my toothbrush (duh). You know, the essential things.
Thanks for your concern. Thankfully, my house is intact and I don't smell like campfire. Should either of those things change I'll be sure to let you know.
T
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